Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:


Say it on my face, not through your status.Related

A Guy was called for an interview by Chevron based on his performance while working for Shell.
The Interviewer
Akpos asked; What is your current pay at Shell and what are you looking at with Chevron?


The Guy said; 9 Million Naira per annum plus medical and other benefits. Considering the position here in Chevron, I'd be looking at 20-22 Million Naira per annum, a status car, overseas vacation and medicals.


Akpos said; Today is your lucky day! The position comes with 35 Million Naira per annum salary, 2014 Range Rover Sport as official car, Mercedes Benz S65 AMG as status car, overseas medical treatment. A fully furnished house in Lekki, health insurance for your wife and children, 2 houses to be built for you in any town of your choice and in your village, annual overseas vacation for you and your family fully-paid first class, 2 Million Naira wardrobe allowance per annum, cook, steward and 2 drivers, country club membership, and you are entitled to keep all that the company gives you if you put in just 3 years of service. The Guy in bewildered excitement exclaimed; Haaaa! Sir, you must be joking.


Akpos said; Of course I am joking. Were you not the one that started it?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-13 18:41:39

518 Views



IN YOUR HANDS [Read it]


Akpos comes home bleeding.... WIFE: What happened? AKPOS: Vincent hit me with a hammer. WIFE: Didn't you have anything in your
hands? AKPOS: I had. WIFE: What? AKPOS: His wife's BOOBs!
#BOLLY_SMART™


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-03 17:51:50

395 Views




Difficulties increase the nearer we approach the goal.

-Johann Wolfgang von GoetheRelated

There was this robbery in Central Bank of
Nigeria, the robber shouted to everyone: "All
don't move, money belongs to the state, life
belongs to you".
Everyone in the bank laid down quietly.
=>This is called "Mind Changing Concept -->
Changing the conventional way of thinking".
---------------------------------------
One lady lay on the table provocatively, the
robber shouted at her "Please be civilized!
This is a robbery and not a rape!"
=>This is called "Being Professional --> Focus
only on what you are
trained to do!"
---------------------------------------
When the robbers got back, the younger
robber (MBA trained) told the older robber
(who is only primary school educated), "Big
bro, let's count how much we got", the older
robber rebutted and said, "You very silly,
so much money, how to
count? Tonight TV will tell us how much we
robbed from the bank!"
=>This is called "Experience --> nowadays
experience is more important than paper
qualifications!"
---------------------------------------
After the robbers left, the bank manager told
the bank supervisor to call the police quickly.
The supervisor says "Wait, wait wait, let's put
the #5 million we embezzled into the
amount the robbers robbed".
=>This is called "Swim with the tide -->
converting an unfavorable situation to your
advantage!"
---------------------------------------
The supervisor says "It will be good if were
is a robbery every month".
=>This is called "Killing Boredom --
>Happiness is most important."
---------------------------------------
The next day, TV news reported that #100
million was taken from the bank. The
robbers counted and counted and counted,
but they could only count #20 million. The
robbers were very angry and complained
"We risked our lives and only took #20
million, the bank manager took #80 million
with a snap of his fingers. It looks like it is
better to be educated than to be a thief!"
=>This is called "Knowledge is worth as
much as gold !"
BE EDUCATED!


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-24 08:44:00

735 Views




A new drug has just been developed for lesbians with depression. It’s called Trycoxagain!Related

.?
Peru Has More Pyramids Than Egypt
Christmas Trees Originated From
Germany
More People Die From Falling Coconuts
Than From Shark Attacks
The Earth Is Struck By Lighting Over 100
Times Every Second
Over 25,000 Left Handed People Are
Killed A Year From Using Right Handed
products
Gorillas Sleep 14 Hours A Day
The Life Span Of A Squirrel Is 9 Years
The Stomach Acids Found In A Snake
Stomach Can Digest Bones And Teeths
But Not Fur Or Hair
The Word “racecar” Can Be Spelled The
Same Way Backwardly
Emus Cant Walk Backwardly
The Word “underground” Is The Only
Word That Begins And Ends With The
Letters “und”
For Every Human There Are 200 Million
Insects
The Average Bed Contains Over 6 Billion
Dust Mite
An Iguana Can Stay Under Water 4 28
Minutes
America’s Top Selling Ice Cream Flavour
Is Vanilla
The Doorbell Was Invented In 1831
The Oldest Known Vegetable Is The Pea
The Average Hen Lays 228 Eggs A Year
Iceland Consumes More Cocacola Than
Any Oda Country



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-27 10:05:42

286 Views



Piece of Cake [Read it]


Little Johnny walked into the kitchen, saw his
mother making a
cake and announced, "I'll be playing in my room
for the next two
hours. I sure would like a piece of cake when
you're finished." Later, when his mother brought him a piece of
cooled cake, Little
Johnny exclaimed, "Golly, it worked!" Puzzled, his mother asked, "What do you mean?" Little Johnny replied, "Daddy said that in order to
get a piece
around here, you have to spend a couple of hours
playing first!"#AoN


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-09-03 18:33:33

845 Views




]The taxi that stopped to pick me wasn’t the type of taxi I would have gotten into but at that time of the night, I had no choice. I placed my bags on the bag seat, and joined him in front. I was careful while entering the front seat, I didn’t want the Jersey to expose my nakedness.
On the way to Ago, I kept calling Timi but he didn’t pick up the phone. I didn’t call Jafar because I knew he was going to scold me. I started a conversation with the driver, he seemed about my age, I noticed he was staring at my chest, the cold night was having an effect on my nips.
Me: are you ACN or PDP?
Driver : madam I swear, na whoever give me money I go support…all of them be thieves
Me: that money go turn your belle o…
Driver: na lie, na my own part of the national cake. Everybody know say na Gbenga Daniel go win, but if ACN wan waste their money, wetin concern me?
Me: are you married?
Driver: yes, I get three pikin sef..
Me: no vex o, how old are you?
Driver: 24 yrs, this December.
Me: hmmmm..how is madam?
Driver: she dey fine…
I decided to discontinue the conversation, he probably wouldn’t understand if I told him he had probably spoilt his life before it even started.
Due to the recent student killings, the town was scanty, even the indigenes of Ago-iwoye stayed indoors after dark. I told the driver to take me to Aiyegbami, but as we approached Jafar’s house, he stopped.
Me: take me closer na..
Driver: no vex madam, around this time I no fit carry you reach that side. The guys wey dey stay there whoski!
Me: just go front small…
Driver: abeg no vex, na here I go turn back.
I took a look at the three bags at the bag seat, Jafar’s house was still about 70m from our position. But the driver wasn’t moving an inch. So I got down and started the agonizing walk to his house.
It was dark, the path leading to the house had wild bourgenvilla growing at opposite ends. The pink flowers was an irony to the kind of guys that they led to. I must have been very stupid to have left Timi’s house like this, I looked at myself with only a Jersey on. At least I would have put on panties. As I approached the house I heard footsteps behind me. I was scared…
Voice: who goes there?
I kept walking, forgetting how heavy the bags were, I walked faster..
Voice: stop, you they crase!
I had to stop at that point, the voice wasn’t joking. In no time, two guys were infront of me, they shone a light on my face that temporarily blinded me…
Guy (Voice): Oh madam! Na you…you for talk na…
I looked at the guy talking, he was light skinned in complexion, he wore a black over-all , the other guy with him wore the same, but he was dark in complexion. I didn’t know them.
Me: I am going to the house.
I pointed to Jafar’s crib.
They insisted in helping me carry a bag each, I noticed that they quicky put something around their waste…guns
I thanked them after we got to the front of the house, they dropped the bags and disappeared into the night..I knocked for about 3 minutes with no response..
Me: Hellooooooo!..
The curtain beside the door, shifted abit…I couldn’t make out the face but it peeked at me. The door opened, as I entered, I was surrounded by about twelve guys, they were all trying to hide their guys…I saw it..
It occurred to me that my knocking must have alerted them of an intruder…the smell of cigarette and marijuana was faintly hidden. Uche was standing at the corner, his pump-action was too large to hide, he gave up and placed it on the snooker table…
Uche : welcome..wetin you buy come for us?
Me: myself…
I realized the statement looked awkward, especially with the way I was dressed…some of the guys tried to hide their smiles with a cough or two…I was slightly embarrassed..
Uche: Jafar dey him room..
And with that, they turned their back on me and started saying things I didn’t bother to comprehend…
I knocked on Jafar’s door…
Jafar : come in!..
As I entered the room, I didn’t see anybody…until I felt a cold metal on my cheek..
I turned in the metal holder’s direction..
Jafar : Tana…what are you doing here?
Me: nothing…I just came to say “hi”
He laughed as he lowered his gun….i had missed his laugh..
Jafar : Seriously, isn’t it too late?
Me: oya, lemme go back to where I am coming from..
I acted like I wanted to walk out of the room, he didn’t move an inch..
Me: you won’t call me back?
Jafar: your bags are still here..
That was true, I looked at him, frowned my face and pouted.
Jafar: its dangerous out there…I am not impressed..
Me: I am sorry, I couldn’t stay with Timi..
He led me to the bed, we sat…
Jafar: are you okay though?
Me: yes I am…
Jafar: we will talk later, the guys and I have to go out now?
Me: Ahn ahn…this late?
Jafar: yes…I will see you later…
Me: later when?
Jafar: we should be back before sunrise…
Me: where are you going to?
The look he gave me told me I had just asked a stupid question..
Jafar: when I get back we will talk..
Me: ok..
Jafar: You would have to stay here, Uche stays in the room you and Toun vacated..
I frowned my face like I didn’t plan to stay in his room..
Me: ok..
He changed his clothes into a darker one, and in no time, the house was relatively empty…
I said a silent prayer, that whatever he was going to do, wherever he was going, God should bring him back in one piece. I tried Timi’s number one more time, he didn’t pick my call..i fell ontop of his bed and slept.
I was in the middle of the street, I was surrounded by people…I was screaming but nobody came to my aid, infront of me, sprawled on the floor with blood gushing out of his side was a dead Jafar..Eli was in the crowd too, grinning sheepishly…Toun later came to my side and started crying with me…I was crying when I woke up…it was a dream, I could hear somebody knocking the door but I was too paralyzed to stand..The person kept knocking…
Jafar: Tana, open the door…
I heard his voice…the kind of happiness I felt was overwhelming…I rushed to open the door, I almost tripped as I got there…
Jafar: sorry I woke u up, it’s about 3am..
Me: keep waking me up…as long as you keep coming back
Jafar: huh?
I forced a hug from him…
Me: welcome…how was it…you look tired…
He walked into the room and pulled his shirt and trouser…I helped him hang them in his wardrobe…
Jafar: you should got to sleep now, I will take my bath now…
Me: Okay…
I went back to bed and started thinking about the dream. I couldn’t stop myself from crying, I felt so terrible…the stupid Evanescence song “my immortal” was playing in his speakers, my pain and the pain of the song got to me…
Jafar: what is wrong?
I didn’t know when he had finished taking his bath, he was on a boxer shot, a towel was round his neck.
Me: nothing…
Jafar: tell me…pls…you are crying…
He removed the towel from his neck and lay down beside me…
Me: I had a dream…
Jafar: tell me what it was about…
Me: you died in the dream, and I was crying…I was surrounded by people…Eli killed you…
I started crying again…he cleaned my tears with his palm..
Jafar: stop crying, it’s just a dream…it won’t happen…
Me: my dreams come to pass…
Jafar: this one won’t….
Me: promise?
Jafar: I promise…
I cleaned my eyes..he was looking at me like I was a little crazy…so I laughed…
Jafar: you are beautiful…laughing with tears in your eyes…
Me: I am?
He bent down and kissed me…he started with the tip of my lips…then I spread my lips open..the warmth of his mouth was heavenly….he raised the Jersey over my head, he was pleasantly surprised when he realized I was naked…he came on top of me…the full length of him…tasted my neck…then my nips…my hands where spread wide like I was an eagle…I was making sounds I have never made before…it was like he was rolling his tongue…I was trembling…I pushed him to his back, then I climbed him…I kissed every part of his unique face…his goatee pressed against my cheek as I kissed his adam’s apple…my fingers went to his nips…before my lips joined them…my bum was shot upward, like he was a power bike…my vee was moist in anticipation…I ran my hand down his hard abdomen till it got to his boxers, my lips returned to his lips…I caressed his D--k, the thin cotton material of his boxer short was finding it hard to hold on to the hardness that was trying to breakout…the more I caressed, the harder it got…I found the buttons that covered the opening infront of the boxers, freeing it, I dipped my hand inside to bring out his D--k…he let out a controlled sound…I started grinding my hips on his…his D--k was pressed against my vee, the lips of my vee..partly swollen now with heightened excitement, the fluid was rubbing against the top of his D--k, the wet slopping sound audible…I wanted him inside of me…I wanted it then more than I wanted anything in the world…he held my hands and gently placed me on the bed…He gave me a look like he was asking for my consent before he proceeded..
Me: I want you…
I spread my legs, reached out for his D--k and guided it to the entrance of my vee..as he leaned closer…the lips spread open…soaking and warm..he stopped again and looked at me…i pulled him by the neck so that his face was on the bed, beside my face…my right hand held the back of his head, his chest was pressed against my b-----s…my left hand was at his back…
Me: make love to me….
He entered me.
To be continued


>>

I MISS YOU MUM EPISODE 2 (STORY BY DINDY)
Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story...
Three years later I became 7 years and my mum was pregnant with a baby.
There was a day my dad took my mum to the hospital when I left for school in the morning (that day was a Friday), so when I came back from school I was afraid because i didn't find my mum at home. I asked my aunty about my mum then she told me that my mum is ok that she went to the hospital with my dad and she would be back soon, after hearing that my mind came to a rest.
I and my aunty were at home when my dad called my aunt and told her that my mum was about to put-to-bed, when my aunt dropped the call she said "Junior be expecting a little bro or sis in the house", I was very happy to hear those words.
The next day my dad called that he was coming home with my mum and the little baby, my aunty put the phone on loud speaker so i heard it all, I quickly ran and stood at the window side of my room waiting and looking outside for their arrival.
Three hours later I heard a horn (I knew it was my dad's because his car horn was unlike the regular ones I heard in my area), my aunty went straight to open the gate then my dad drove in, all the organs in my body became so happy to see them.
My room was upstairs so I had to run downstairs to meet them, as I was running I fell with my keen to the ground (i think I injured myself but I didn't feel it maybe because of the fact that I was too happy to feel it), I ran out side and opened the back door of my dad's car for my mum to come out with the baby.
I began to jump up and down like a rabbit who just saw a carrot, I jumped to see the baby's face but I was not tall enough, my mum saw that I wanted to see the baby's face so she bent down for me to see the baby's face then she said "it's a boy". I was so wowed (me seeing my little brother's innocent face for the first time was a great feeling), I felt a smile in my heart ---babies are really wonderful indeed--.
I looked into his amazing soft eyes and it took me to another universe of peace, my mum stood up and went inside, I followed her slowly at her back like a kid that has been hypnotize with chocolate.
When she got to her room she placed my little brother on the bed, I walked up to him and I saw how his mouth was toothless, it made me laugh in a way then he looked at me and he squeezed his face (i was like; what's wrong with this boy, why did he frown when he saw me), my mum came close to me and said "Neil now you have a younger brother that you can always play with). --My mum prefers to call me Neil than to call me Junior because she was the one that gave me the name but my dad likes calling me Junior--.
As time went on I began to get jealous of my little brother because he got all the attention, although my mum always tries to do her best to never leave me behind but still my little bro got more attention than me from her, anytime I tried to get close to my little bro (when my dad is carrying him) my dad will always end up pushing me aside (i felt so bad anytime he does it).
Each time I enter my parent's room my dad will always send me out, he would say "Bia Junior you are no more a kid again", those words made me feel bad, it was as if my dad hated me more than ever since my younger brother came to existence.
There was a night that my little bro cried so loud that no one in the house was able to sleep -- what's my biz, I slept like a baby in its mother's womb-- but I slept very peacefully and I didn't even hear a sound as I slept (i even dreamt of tom and jerry {laughs}; that cartoon is one silly cartoon, they keep fighting each other but non of them ever dies and if they eventually die they always come back to life in the next episode).
When I woke up in the morning my aunty asked me whether I slept in my room alone with all the noise that was going on which was made by my younger bro, I said "yes aunty I slept and I dream of tom and jerry but aunty I did not hear when baby was crying", My aunty was totally surprised.
I left my aunty and went to see my mum and dad to greet them "good morning" and to also see my little bro, i got to my parent's room then i knocked
--I remember a time I didn't knock and I entered my parent's room, when I opened the door it hit my dad on his nose and he started bleeding, he could had killed me with cain but luckily for me my mum was there to calm him down, his eyes that day made me so afraid that I didn't know whether to run front or back, I was just in a single position and my mind was in a spot of no return at that point of time and space--.
When I opened the door I saw my mum and dad sleeping but my little bro was awake, so I walked up to him to see his face, he was dancing and kicking his hands and legs (in a childish way, I guess he was in his happy hour).
When I tried touching him he started crying which woke my dad and mum up, my dad got up and shouted at me with all the strength and energy he had in him, my mum tried to calm him down but he refused and pushed me out of his room.
I went straight to my room still hearing his angry manly voice shouting and complaining about me and my behaviour, in my mind I was confused because I didn't know what I did wrong that made him angry....To be continue.... "After the expression of an unbelievable event".
STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI
contact me on
Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433
Email: [email protected]
or
Email: [email protected] Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi
Skype: 07087750433
or
Skype: [email protected]
Twitter: @nnamdiossy
INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi.







NAIRAJOKES.COM




Rate this story
Add Your Own Rating



Interesting



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Educative



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Unique



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Organization



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%







Kuu got up and saw Riri. Her beautiful perfume
smelled all over her. Kuu immediately knew the
intention she had. As to whether he will be able
to
resist that temptation, only time will tell. Her kiss was very sensational, to be honest Kuu
wanted more of it. When Kuu saw her,he said
“Riri, what are you doing here? This is not right”
Kuu said.
Riri shushed him by placing her hand on his lips
right after which landed another kiss on his lips. It was getting intense as they began feeling each
other’s breath.
Suddenly, Kuu came to his senses. As difficult as it
was, he pushed Riri away.
Riri tried coming back towards him, but he stood
aside and stopped her. “Kuu, don’t do this to me. I love you. I have loved
you all this while but you have never noticed me.I
really love you” Riri said.
Surprisingly, there were some form of sincerity in
her words.
Riri was truly being truthful. She was really in love with Kuu.
Kuu noticed and went closer to her. He then
placed
his hands on her shoulders and looked into her
eyes.
“Riri, how come you didn’t tell me all these?” he asked.
“That’s why I’m here now Kuu. I have never loved
any man like this before and I’m willing to do
anything to prove this” Riri said.
Kuu was very gentle to her. He then asked her to
sit by her side so they could talk. “I don’t doubt what you’re telling me. Don’t
wanna
take advantage of this moment and have
something to do with you, that will hurt you
more.
I have already done that to someone i really cherish and I’m yet to write up my wrongs. I don’t
want you to go through the same. Let’s find
appropriate time so we talk about it, please Riri. ”
Kuu said.
Riri began feeling bad. She noticed Kuu was a
good person. She began feeling bad about herself.
“Thank you Kuu” she said and stood up to go.
Before she stepped foot outside the door, she
turned and said to Kuu, “I have something to tell
you. Make time for us then we can talk about it,”
she said and left the room. Unfortunately, as soon as she stepped out of
Kuu’s
room and shut the door behind her, she ran into
Mansa who was by then going to the kitchen for
some water.
Mansa was surprise to see her come from Kuu’s room. Riri didn’t say anything to her. She just
went
straight into the guest room.
Somehow Mansa was hurt by what she saw. She
didn’t go to the kitchen again for the water. She
initially wanted to confront Kuu about what she had seen but went into her room and harboured
everything.
Early the next morning, Kuu was getting ready to
go and see his brother Chris at the police station.
He still loved his brother though Chris had always
paid him back with bitterness. It was at this moment when he heard a knock on
his door, it was his mother.
She came in and found out that Kuu was getting
dressed up.
“Where are you going this early morning? Mrs
Amposah asked. “To see Chris, i want to see if i can get the lawyer
to
get him out before its too late” Kuu answered
” Don’t worry my son. I got it covered. I will be
meeting the lawyer today” Mrs Amposah said
“I thought you said you were travelling this morning with Riri” Kuu asked.
” Yeah, that’s the more reason why I’m here.
Where
is Riri? I went to the guest room but she is not
there” Mrs Amposah said
” I haven’t seen her this morning. Can she leave without telling you” Kuu asked.
“Naa, i don’t think so. Let me try reaching her on
phone” Mrs Amposah said and walked out of the
room.
Before Kuu stepped out of his room, he had a
phone call from an unknown private number. He picked up only to find out it was Obed.
“Hey Obed, where are you? I have been looking
for
you since yesterday” Kuu said.
” I’m sorry Kuu. I had something i needed to take
care of. I just want to tell you not to go anywhere within the next hour, someone wants to see you”
Obed said.
“Me? Who is that? Kuu asked.
“Don’t worry about that. Just don’t go anywhere
in
the next hour. By the way tell Mansa that she will soon hear from me” Obed said and quickly
hanged
up.
Kuu couldn’t call back because the number was
privatised.
Kuu went straight into Mansa’s room. She was reading her bible when she got there.
“Yes, how may i help You” Mansa said in a very
hash tone as soon as she saw Kuu enter.
” Wow, seems you had a bad night” Kuu said
when
he noticed her tone was very harsh towards him. That was unusual of her but he ignored it.
“Indeed it was bad. What are you doing in my
room?” Mansa asked.
“Cool down sis. What has come over you? I just
came to check up on you and i also have a
message from Obed” Kuu said. ” Whats the message?” Mansa asked straight
away.
” Well, he called me just some few minutes ago.
He
said you will soon hear from him” Kuu gave her
the message. ” Ok. Is that all? Mansa asked
“ermmm Yeah. Mansa why are you….. ” Kuu asked
but Mansa didn’t make her finish.
“I’m going to shower up so later” Mansa said and
walked out on him into the shower.
Kuu felt that perhaps Mansa had somehow gotten to know that he was the behind the rape.
He went out of her room and headed to the living
room.
Mrs Amposah was on her way out when he got
there.
Apparently, she had not heard from Riri ever since she left the house without her notice that
morning.
She was on her way to look for her whereabout,
then later rush to the police station to see Chris.
About 45 minutes after she left, the gate man
came into the living room where Kuu was seated.
“Sir, someone is at the gate looking for you” He
said.
” Who is that? Kuu asked.
” Sir, i really don’t know” he said.
“Ok, bring him in” Kuu instructed him. The gate man did accordingly as instructed by
Kuu.
He came back with the visitor. Kuu was so was
surprised to see such person in the house
because
the visitor was not looking familiar in any way. “Good day sir. I’m looking for Kuu” said the
visitor.
“I:m the one madam” Kuu said.
” You are Kuu? Oh my God, you look exactly like
your father” said the visitor.
“Ermm excuse madam, who are you? Kuu asked. “I’m your mother, my son” she said.


>>

People often feel something but express something else.

They mean something but say something else.

So learn the art of saying nothing in such a way that it leaves nothing unsaid.

Good Morning!Related

British people are highly indebted and obliged to sikhs, we needed their help twice and they did help us very well. As a result of their timely help, we are able to live with dignity, honour and independence.

-Sir W. ChurchillRelated

(SEMI-FINAL EPISODE) - Episode 38

Cynthia writhed this way and that on the floor,
clutching her belly.
Vanessa picked the syringe again but this time,
she didn’t go to Mma.
She walked straight to where Cynthia was
squirming in pains on the floor. ‘Lemme see if your wedding will be in hell!’
She had leaned over to deliver the injection when
the star-producing blow landed on her head.
She slumped to the floor.
‘You don’t mess with my patients!’ Dr Hope
dropped the metallic height rod and helped Cynthia up.
She was bleeding.
A nurse guided her away while Dr Hope attended
to Mma.

Drop Your Comments Fans Of Daniel Nkado The
Writer Of The Story..

This Story Will End Today.. Is Remaining The Final
Episode..It will Be Posted Today Depending on the
Comments I get

>>

Continues..
The next morning when I woke up,he was not beside me. I tried walking to the bathroom but I could not walk properly. I walked as if I was being raped by three men not that his hood was huge but the force was to the fullest. I sat down on the bed just replaying last night. Someone opened the room it was Miranda. Thank God Preston covered the blood spot.
Miranda:hey babe, how are you?
Me:I am fine. Where is preston?
Miranda:hmmmm. This one you did not even ask about my health and you asked of Preston first. I hope hmmm everything is okay?
MeI smiled). Okay how about you? How are you doing?
Miranda:I am also fine. Preston is with Presley they are discussing something
Me:aren’t you going to lecture today?
Miranda:I will go how about you?
MeI was now biting my finger. I didn’t wanted to tell her about last night) I won’t go
Miranda:why?abi na love don dey shack you?eh eh that reminds me..why did you shout last night?
Me:uhmmmm….(the door opened and Preston walked in. I was so happy because the minute he entered, he had saved me from questions)
Mirandah preston you are here. I have to get ready for class. See you later bar.(she left and preston locked the door and came to sit with me on the bed).
Preston:I hope you are fine now?
Me:yeah. The pain is dying slowly.
Preston:will you be able to go to class?
Me:nope
Preston:why?
Me:because I can’t walk properly
Preston:wow! OK then. I will stay with you
Me:really, you will do that for me?
Preston:yeah anything for you!(the pecked me and left the room)
Then miranda walked in with my luggage.
Miranda:see your luggage your things are all inside am off.
Me:thanks love I was starting to wonder what I will wear
Miranda:by the time I come back eh you will explain yourself to me(we both laughed. She winked at me and left)
I finally managed to take my bath and change the bedsheets. I wore my favourite coloured clothes. The colours I used to create THE NOBLES. It was lemon and orange. Almost
all my clothes were orange and lemon. I was weak and hungry. I just laid on the bed. Few minutes later Preston came in(he was already dressed)
Me:where did you go
Preston:I went to get you something to eat
Mekay….what about the clothes?
Prestonh, I used the bathroom in the guest room and the clothes are my spare ones I have in the laundry room.
Me:this will be a big house then
Preston:yeah guess you have done your hygiene?
To be continued..


NAIRAJOKES.COM




Rate this story
Add Your Own Rating



Interesting



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Educative



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Unique



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Organization



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%






A real Guy [Read it]


- A real guy doesn't code his phone.
- A real guy will give his girlfriend his phone to
hold for some moments.

- A real guy doesn't get pissed off when seen his
girlfriend hugging other guys.
- A real guy will kiss his girlfriend in front of
other girls.
- A real guy will use his girlfriend's pics has is d.p
on Facebook, Bbm, 2go, whatsapp etc.
- A real guy is hard to find.
TRUE or FALSE



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-09-26 11:44:37

205 Views




When Karwa Chauth fasted For Rajinikanth, the ODI Cricket match abandoned!

Ishant Sharma bragged, “Now play without me!”Related

One evening a father overheard his son saying his prayers "God bless Mommy, Daddy and Grammy. Goodbye Grampa."
Well, the father thought it was strange, but he soon forgot about it.
The next day, the Grandfather died.
A month later the father heard his sony saying prayers again: "God bless Mommy. God bless Daddy. Goodbye Grammy."
The next day the grandmother died.
Well, the father was getting more than a little woried about the whole situation.
One week later, the father once again overheard his sons prayers. "God Bless Mommy. Good bye Daddy."
This nearly gave the father a heart attack. He didn’t say anything but he got up early to go to work, so that he would not meet the traffic. He was so disturbed that he branched to a bar to have some drinks. Finally after midnight he went home. He was still alive! When he got home he appologised to his wife for comeback late. "I am sorry Honey. I had a very bad day at work today."
"You think you’ve had a bad day? YOU THINK YOU’VE HAD A BAD DAY!?" the wife cried out loud,
"what happened honey?" asked the man with so much fear
"The gateman dropped dead this morning!" answered the wife.
The man shouted "Oooo! Thank God".



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-07 12:27:21

15341 Views




Akpos was very pressed. But luckily for him, he passed by a lonely school where no eyes was preying.

He noticed a sign board behind the school with the inscription that says" DO NOT URINATE HERE". But Akpos ignored the message and satisfyingly did his business beside the sign board.

Unfortunately for him, a man, who was apparently the principal of the school, came out and shouted at Akpos, "Are you blind?! Didn't you see the sign board which says 'DO NOT URINATE HERE'?"

Akpos replied, "I saw it, but I thought it was the name of the school."


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2014-10-28 09:12:10

180 Views



Nigeria Police [Read it]


AMERICAN POLICE STYLE:
Allow the thief to catch you,
then you catch
the thief.
.
CHINA POLICE STYLE: Chase the
thief
until he becomes tired,
then
you catch him.
ARAB POLICE STYLE: Kidnap the
thief's wife and threaten the
thief to
surrender.
INDIAN POLICE STYLE: Sing for the
thief until
he comes close to you, then catch
him.
NIGERIAN POLICE STYLE: Catch any
person on the street, beat him
until
he agrees that he's a thief.
Don't forget NIGERIA POLICE IS YOUR FRIEND.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-10-26 14:10:09

757 Views




The first rubber condoms were very thick and made to be washed out and reused.Related

A hausa guy was dating an igbo girl for 2 months, one day his dad send him an errand, fortunately he saw the girl coming towards him.. He was so excited when she approaches him, she greet him and, he urge her to come near his friend's shop and sit down but his girlfriend refuse to do so, she said she's ok as she remain standing becoz she will soon go.. When her boyfriend notice she's standing inside the sun but didn't know how to say it in English......... He then said to her my dear "leave afternoon and come to evening"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-10-27 18:27:39

743 Views




Multiple personalities: because sometimes you need backup!Related

Nollywood [Read it]


Many of us usually watch nigerian films without observing what is happening,we just watch it for watching sake.
Just yesterday i was watching african magic and i observe that someone died with afro and when apperaring on a ghost mode he comes with lowcut.
Abi barbing salon the that side, #shoroniyen.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-11 16:44:48

443 Views




I looked at my phone and it was my old man
my old man calling
Me: Hello Daddy……………
Pman: Ekun, where are you……….
Me: Am at home daddy
Pman: Which home………………..
Me: My house sir….
Pman: You are not serious..me and your
mother are in your house
Me: I will join you soon…
Pman: Ma pe oooo (don’t stay long oo)
I dropped the call, in my mind I started
thinking “I hope dey didn’t meet this devil at
home”…..”now have fumbled totally, they only
know Biola with me but which kind wahala be
this”.
I started heading back home..i got to my
house, entered my flat and met my parent on
the dinning table eating..on my mind I was
like “Gosh….this devil is still around”…I greeted
them and they responded..my old man and
mum instantly noticed that I was not in a
happy mood as I just sat down on my 2 sitter
after greeting them……..After a while, Mary
walked out of the kitchen to pack the plate
they eat in….
Pman: Snakie…..lets see, lets have a man to
man talk
Me: Ohk Sir…..
“I led him to my room leaving my mum and
mary in the sitting room”
Pman: whats wrong with you my boy? I hope
all is well
Me: All is well Sir
Pman: But your face and body language says
otherwise
Me: Everytyn is fine and under control Sir….
Pman: You see my son, I know how it feel like
being in this kind of your situation…..have
been there before and I know how it feels..you
no some of the best tyn that happens to most
of us in life are things we never prepared for
and to you it shouldn’t be an issue cos we
your parent know you are capable and you are
matured enough to handle the situation..
“for my mind, whats this man talking about?”
Me: All is well Sir, but I don’t understand what
you are talking about
Pman: What is it you don’t understand? U
know my boy…there comes a time in life when
we make our decisions and whichever decision
we make we pray God guide us through..and
you know sometimes in life, we have our own
plan but God has another plan for us but
whatever God has in plan for us I believe is
always the best. Moreover this is what me and
your mum has been praying for as the only
man and last born of the family…and thank
God u eventually gave us even though we
know its not from where we expected
“Now totally confused..cut in”
Me: …..what are you talking about dad?
Pman: You see my boy, the next thing for us
should be how we will put our house together
and see Mary’s parent before people started
noticing her so that we can do what we want
to do on time
Me: Visit Mary’s parent for what? What did
she tell you?
Pman: He tell us everytyn……Her 3 weeks
pregnancy for you, Biola and the way you have
been cold to her
Me: Pregnancy? For who? How? When?…i
don’t understand, who impregnated her
Pman: Are you asking me? Am the one that
impregnated her now….was it not sweet when
you were doing it? You are now asking silly
question………..I believe it your responsibility
and you cant run away from it, we your parent
are happy with what happened even though
we never expected that you had any other girl
aside Biola but what do we do in this
situation….If Mary is your junior sister and a
guy put her in the family way will u be happy
if the guy rejected him or will it be good for
her to terminate it? See my friend, nothing
must happen to the pregnancy and have
instructed your mother to put up necessary
things in place for us to visit your inlaw..
Me: Which inlaw dad….but
Pman: But what? You have a good Job, you
are good looking, mary is not looking bad and
she’s a beautiful girl so, watz delaying you…
Fine maybe Biola was your choice but I
believe you know what you were doing before
you started affairs with her…its your
responsibility and you have to accept it or you
want it to show before we go do the necessary
things? I will be traveling to Abuja
tomorrow..am going for a two weeks business
trip and your mum will be here with you for
these period as she said she wanted to spend
some time with you not knowing that we will
meet this issue on ground.
Have also instructed your mum to make
necessary arrangement for our meeting with
your inlaw so that we can visit immediately
am back………….Be a man for once my boy
Me: hmmmmmm
That was the last statement my old man
made on his way out of my room..i started
soliloquising “Pregnancy? When? How?………..i
don buy market wey pass my own, now its all
over”…
I went back to the sitting room and met my
mum and Mary gisting, they were definitely in
a happy mood..i was still trying to figure out
what Mary must have told my parent to
convince them..moreover am just hearing
about pregnancy from my old man for the first
time..”Mary, lets see” I said..she follows me
inside
Mary: ehn..ehn….whats it (Frown face….first
time I will be seeing that)
Me: what did u tell my parent? Where did u
get pregnancy from? It seems you are
dreaming cos I now know your plan and it will
never work out..i have my fiancée
Mary: whats my plan? When you are doing it
and enjoying yourself, u never know it will turn
out this way abi? Oh I forgot? You have your
fiancée den what am i? Fipa abi……..a fling
you just want to use to quench your konji?
Since that’s what you wanted, this is your
result
(Handing a paper to me..i was dumb for some
few seconds collecting the sheet of paper from
her)
I opened the paper and what I saw was a
pregnancy test result..Mary was 3 weeks gone
according to the result…..
Me: I have to take you to hospital personally
for another test…
Mary : As your lordship please anytym u are
ready…(she answered in affirmative)
”Now I know am into it and know escape route
and my parent will never buy into
abortion..how will I even tell them? Will I be
force to marry someone I don’t love? How will
I cope in a compulsory marriage which I never
wanted in the first place)




NAIRAJOKES.COM




Rate this story
Add Your Own Rating



Interesting



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Educative



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Unique



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Organization



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%







Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.

~ Mahatma Gandhi, Non-violence in Peace and War, 1948Related

MARA episode 6 [Read it]


“And you told them not to go?” I asked
“Yes ma” she said and I slapped her again
She held her face as she wept out loudly again
“What does your mother hate most?” I asked
“Lies” she replied amidst her tears
“What did they go and do in the market?” I asked and as she wiped her tears, sniffing and reluctant to talk, I broke down into tears
“Why Taiwo? What have I done to deserve this? What have I done to deserve all these Taiwo?” I cried out the more and though she still sniffed wetly, she stopped crying
I had never cried before my children before!
Never!
She must have been shocked
I was shocked myself…I didn’t plan it.
I was just so overwhelmed by so many thoughts that the best thing for me to do was to cry.
“I try my best to give you everything needed. You are growing now and little proceeds from my business, I use to buy you fine dresses. The wrappers I have now are the ones I had been using over five years ago but I have been giving you almost all you need. You might not be comparable to all kids, but am I not trying?” I asked
It was meant to be a rhetorical question but she answered
“You are trying ma” she said
“So, why Taiwo? Why would you send your brothers to Kasuwa to beg for alms? Why?” tears ran down my face
“I am sorry mum. WAEC registration closes tomorrow and I was not able to tell you since I know you had nothing. I was crying today as you went out when James and John asked me why. I told them and the next moment they told me they were going to the market for Almajiri. I told them not to go but eventually, I allowed them to go” she confessed and my heart got swollen up.
“WAEC Registration closes tomorrow?” I asked again.
“Yes ma”
“So, your brothers volunteered to beg for alms to raise WAEC fee? How would they raise enough for both of you? How? #28,000 isn’t small o”
My head had started pounding
“Kehinde already has her own money.” She said and my eyes opened in shock
“How? Who gave her?” I asked again
“Benjamin” she replied
“Who is Benjamin?” I asked again
“Her classmate’s brother” she said again, fumbling with her wrapper.
“A boy or a girl?” I asked again, foolishly.
My head couldn’t just compute all I was hearing
“A boy ma” she replied
“Her boyfriend?” I asked again. Taiwo avoided my face and my heart dropped.
I am in serious soup!
“Answer me nah” I almost screamed
“They are just friends ma. That was what she told me” she said
I was tired of beating her
“What did she do that made him give her that much? Tell me the truth ehn, I won’t beat you” I promised as my heartburn increasing.
“Mummy,..” she was reluctant
“Just tell me” I said again.
“He met us on the way and we were crying. He said we should come and I said no. Kehinde went to meet him”
“Jesu!” I exclaimed, loudly, holding my chest in anguish
“He said he was Benjamin’s brother and Kehinde and him became friends. He said we should not cry that he would give us the money. I said no thank you and he said what about you Kehinde and she said she must go to the university, so she agreed”
She swallowed as she looked at the floor, ashamed to look into my face.
“So?” I wanted a complete story.
“Yesterday, we went to his shop”
“Where?” I cut in
“In Tammah. He sells motor parts” she explained
“Mo ti gbe” I pulled at my hair
“So?”
“He said he would touch Kehinde’s chest before he gives the money. The two chests” she said and my eyes widened
“Chest? Two chests ke? You mean breasts?” I asked and she looked down
“Answer me” I slapped her, my heart thumping hard
“Yes” she answered
“Then, he gave her the money?” I asked again
“Yes. He gave her #10,000 and said she should come back for the remaining today”
“And she has gone?” I asked and she nodded
“Then you said you didn’t know where she went to. Ah, mo ti daran o Jesu!” I scratched my head as I cried the more
She started crying too.
“Would you get out of this room this instant?” I screamed hard and she ran out hurriedly.
I fell to the ground and cried hard.
“Ah ah ah ah, ah! Jesu! Ah ah God of mercy!” I cried so hard.
I never imagined bringing up my children this way.
I knelt before my bed and cried so heavily till my eyes could produce no more tears.
››››››
“Where are the mushrooms?” I called out.
“I am coming ma” Taiwo responded and she brought in a bowlful of them.
There was no more fish in the cabinet so, these ones would suffice …I discovered them as I spread my clothes outside yesterday.
As I dropped the last piece in the already frying Egusi, someone pulled at my wrapper
James!
James the beggar!
“Take your dirty hands off my body jhur” I shouted at him
He laughed, the wide gap in front of his teeth showing glaringly.
“Mummy, many people gave us plenty monies” he said, happily.
“Leave my side now!” I screamed and the pain in my head tummy and eyes increased.
What would I do from here?
Exactly where should I go?
Who should I tell?
“Taiwo, come and make the Eba o.” I shouted
“Mummy, no garri o” she replied
“Go and buy one module from Matan Mallam o”
“Mummy, money nko?” she asked again
“Come and carry it from my head, stupid girl” I was angry and if it was not curbed, I would run mad
“Go and take money from the safe o. If she says the garri is #110, tell her its #100 your mother gave you o. if you buy anything more than #100, I will beat the hell out of you” I said as I entered my room to sleep- if I could get some!


NAIRAJOKES.COM




Rate this story
Add Your Own Rating



Interesting



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Educative



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Unique



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Organization



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%







.
1. A man caught his wife in
bed with his best friend. Out
of anger, he took his gun
and shoots his friend. Out of
fear, his wife shouted,
"FRANK! FRANK! If u continue
like this, u will lose all your
friends o!"
.
2. Peter: teacher, do honey
have legs?
Teacher: No, but why do you
ask?
Peter: because, last night, i
over heard my dad saying,
Honey, please open your
legs wide.
.
3. SON: Mom, grandma is so
annoying, I wish she will just
die.
MOTHER: Idiot, it's your
mother that will die not mine.
.
4. A man goes into a library
and asks for a
book on suicide.
The librarian says, "Bleep
off, you won't bring
it back."
.
5. Ochuko: why are u tip toe-
ing infront of the chemist?
Akpos: I don't want to wake
the sleeping pills
.
6. Okon: why are u writting
this letter so slow?
Akpos: because the person
am writting it to, doesn't
read fast
.
7. Husband buys 5 of the
same color of pants for
his wife.
WIFE: Ah! Same color? People
will
think i don't change my
panties.
HUSBAND Which people?
.
8. Teacher: our topic today
is question tag. Eg: obi is a
boy. Isn't he? Yes he is. Can
I have other examples.
Ochoku: we go chop yam
today Chopin't we?
Teacher: wrong, can
anybody correct him?
Akpors: don't mind that block
head We go chop yam today.
Yamin't we?
Teacher fainted.
.



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-08-25 17:03:24

676 Views



Touching story [Read it]


TEACHER: Who can tell us a Touching Story?


Akpos raised his hands.


TEACHER: Ok Akpos, go on.


AKPOS: One day, I was coming back from the farm, suddenly a girl blocked my way, I touched the girl and she touched me back, I touched her again and she touched me back. So I touched her again and again and again, and I warned her not to touch me back, but to my greatest surprise, she touched me again. Now I pull my clothes and my pants, removed my shoes and my golden chain. Guess what I did next?


The teacher who was aghast at what Akpos was saying timidly asked, "What happened?"  


AKPOS: As I pulled everything, I now touched her back. That's the end of my TOUCHING STORY.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-13 08:32:31

6453 Views




“Let me in!” Jeremy found himself arguing with purity secretary on Monday morning. The woman wouldn’t let him see purity. How did he even get himself into this? It was Edwin Broderick – his father. The man had always dreamed of having a daughter in-law and now he chose Purity. If not for her, he’d die. Jeremy could not afford to lose his father. The mother had died of breast cancer four years ago. He had managed to scale through the pains it caused him and now his father? No, at least not yet. He must give the man grand children. Purity must marry him- he hates her, but must love her for his father.
*
*
*
“NO! I can’t do that.” Heather protested.

Jeremy raked his hair with his left hand. “How could you not? Call her, let her know she has a visitor.”

Heather shook her head stubbornly. “You want to make me lose my job? I’ve called her and she says no. She doesn’t want to see anybody.” she stressed that last word.

“You didn’t tell her my name.” Jeremy was aware that he was the last person Purity would want to see. But if she heard his name, she might bounce out of her office to scold him. He had to risk that. “Tell her its Jeremy Broderick. I’m her fiance for goodness sake!”

“Fiance?” Heather stared at him, eyes with shock. “My boss has a fiance?” she ruffled her hair and laughed. “Are you sure you’re in the right room?”

Jeremy glowered at the secretary. “Do what I asked!” he commanded in a hostile voice.

Heather quickly dialed Purity’s office line again with shaky hands. She couldn’t look Jeremy in the eye, he frightened her.
*
*
*
Purity could hear the ugly conversation going on between her secretary- Heather and Jeremy. She was stunned when she first heard his voice. How could he show up here after what he’d done last night? She hadn’t forgiven him and had not mapped out what to do to him. And he show his sorry face at her company.

She had directed Heather not to let him in. She wasn’t going to see him. She’d frustrate him, deal with him. Let him know that no one takes advantage of her. When he was done making noise and disturbing, he’d quietly leave. She needed to think.

She smiled to herself with contentment.

Now, she had to think, think about how to handle this Jeremy and then her father. She sighed and rested on her swivel chair. She picked up a pen and notepad. She began writing down things. The inter com began ringing. She answered excitedly; hoping to get news that Jeremy Broderick was gone.

“Has he left?”

“No, ma’am.” Heather grudgingly replied. “Um..ma’am… He says he is Jeremy Broderick.”

She violently struck the pen on her desk. It broke.
“I know that! Tell him to get out!”

“Ma’am, not only that.” Heather’s voice was shaking.

Purity was shocked. What else? Last night, he had introduced himself as her fiance. Has he done the same again? Shit! Heather was known for her big mouth. The whole staff would have heard the latest by the next day. Jeremy! She hoped not.
“What else?” she asked, losing her patience.

“He says he’s your fiance.”

Shit! Purity slammed down the receiver. God! She got off her seat to the window. She stared down the busy streets of New York hoping that she’d be able to calm her nerves cause she wanted nothing than murder Jeremy Broderick. She folded her arms, trying to steady her breathing.

While looking down, she heard noises directly at the front of her door. She turned her head to the direction of the door and listened. The sound was becoming clearer and clearer. Sounds of shoes scrapping the floor.

Sounds like two people struggling. Oh, my goodness! I’d forgotten to lock the door.

Purity hurried to the door. As she got there, it swung open. Her eyes popped out. She could see Heather fiercely fighting with Jeremy, trying to prevent him from pulling down the door. He won- the man.

As they saw her, the struggle died down. They stood apart, conscious that someone else was watching them.

“I’m sorry. I tried to stop him, he didn’t listen.” Heather pointed an accusing finger at Jeremy. “He’s just too strong and so stubborn.” she wanted to cry. She feared she’d lose her job.

Purity scanned Jeremy. She noticed how handsome he looked as his hair was out of place. His suit, light blue shirt and black tie slightly rough. All that made him charming. Charming? That was supposed to be despicable. How…? She quickly composed herself.

To Heather, she said, “Its alright. I can handle this.” She glanced at her. Reading her eyes, she knew Heather was waiting for an answer regarding her job. She smirked. “Heather dear, you’ve still got your job as long as you don’t open your big mouth to tell any one what you heard this lunatic say about us.”

Heather felt slightly relieved. She was certain her smile didn’t come from her heart. “I promise.”

“You can leave now. Shut the door as you go. In fact, you have the day off.” Purity couldn’t risk Heather listening to the upcoming conversation she was going to have with Jeremy. Fiance indeed. “Don’t forget to shut your mouth.”

Heather nodded. She walked out and shut the door. Purity ran to lock it quickly. She turned to Jeremy and eyed him intently.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“Purity, calm down. I need to talk to you.”

She laughed sardonically. She met his eyes. “I don’t even know you.”

He paced around for few seconds looking confused. “Gosh! I’m Jeremy Broderick. Your-”

“Would you stop that? I am not going to marry you. Where did you even get the guts from to introduce yourself as my husband-to-be?” she furiously questioned.

“Yeah. You are right. I’m not supposed to say that but that’s what’s bringing us together.”

She marched to her desk and sat on it. He followed her but kept standing.

“I don’t understand.”

“My father talked to me about marrying you.”

“And you agreed.” she rolled her eyes.

He took his hands in his pockets. “For a reason.”

She scoffed. “No one does anything without a reason.” She smiled mockingly.

He drew closer to her. “Don’t you want to know that reason?” He could perceive her feminine scent.

She shook her head i oppose- left and right. “I don’t want to know. Simple.”

“Miss. You have to know it this time.”

What is wrong with this guy? How many times do I have to tell him ‘no’? Purity was in no mood for such argument. She decided to shut up her mouth and just nod sideways.

“I’m damn serious!”Jeremy was beginning to get impatient.

I am too, she wanted to say but she just shook her head left and right.

This was it! He couldn’t take it any longer. “Will you stop being a bitch! Stop acting like you’re miss world or the queen of everyone. Act like a human for once and listen to me!”

A bitch? Miss world? Queen of everyone? Act like a human? Jeremy’s words registered on her head gradually. Of course she was miss world and a princess- soon to be a queen. If she wasn’t acting like a human, then how was she acting? Like an insane one or animalistically? Then this idiot called her a bitch! Who dares call her names? No one. Except her dad- he was an exception cause he was her dad. Damn! Jeremy was crossing his limits. From crushing her cell, to unexpectedly kissing her-no, she hadn’t forgotten it-to carrying her, introducing himself as her God damn fiance, to calling her names! For God’s sake she was tired of this nonsense and she’d bruised her lip cause of him. She was still trying to get over it.

“Excuse me? Did you just call me a bitch?” She jumped down from her desk.

Jeremy moved backwards.

“Listen to me-”

“I’m not going to listen to you unless you listen to me.”

“Oh, shut up! I am not going to listen to the rubbish you want to tell me. Its about the all-mighty reason why you want me to marry you.” She raised her hands in disgust. Then dropped them.

>>

gals be lyk dis wen dem meet their fellow gals
RITA: sweetheart hw fr
SEXY JOY: hi darling am kul, u?
RITA: nice...ah lyk ur hair
SEXY JOY: (head swell) fanks hun!
RITA: welkum deary...am kuming to d house oo how itz gona b?
SEXY JOY: sweet & amazing
RITA: hope u've cooked enof food
SEXY JOY: sure my luv u cn kum ova anytime letz hav fun...
..____________
{ah decided to try it out wid centee b }..
LIL J: sweetheart hw fr
CENTEE B: guy kum...u smoke?
LIL J: handsome i lov dis ur chinus oo
CENTEE B: oboy which day u turn to gay
LIL J: u get food for house...mek i turn kum na
CENTEE B: kum do wetin...shey na ur mama kum cook am keep
LIL J: ok ok mek ah tek u out 4 flexing na
CENTEE B: mek beta thunder fire u dey....u dey find who to tear im yarnsh abi mek una go enjoy free 14 yrs for jail
beta thunder fire u dey if u dnt laf , comment and share dis post
_____
**(jus 4 fun pls...no insults..wid due respect palz)


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-11-28 14:47:36

363 Views




Yesterday is for Memories;

Tomorrow is an Imagination;

But today is a Real Gift;


Have a pleasant day!Related

Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.

-Ralph Waldo EmersonRelated

LAWYER [Read it]


A lawyer had just bought a fancy new car, and was eager to
show it off to his colleagues, when an eighteen wheeler came
out of nowhere and took off the driver's side door with him
standing right there. "NOOO!" he screamed, because he knew
that no matter how good a mechanic tried to fix it, it would
never be the same. Finally, a cop came by, and the lawyer ran
up to him yelling, "MY BENTLEY DOOR WAS JUST
RUINED BY SOME FOOLISH DRIVER!!!"
"You're a lawyer aren't you?" asked the policeman.
"Yes, I am, but what does that have to do with my car?!?!" the
lawyer asked.
"HA! You lawyers are so materialistic. All you care about is
your possessions. I bet you didn't even notice that your left
arm is missing did you?" the cop said.
The lawyer looked down at his side and exclaimed, "MY
ROLEX!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-22 11:34:55

229 Views




BROKEN SEAL
EPISODE 1

The rays of light from the sun
found its way to my
room;brightening the gloomy
house. My alarm wasn’t an
exception, it also cried to the
tone of the rising sun.
I rolled frome one edge of the
bed to the other, finally
waking lazily. I got up from
the bed, still on my nighties,
by my nighties, i mean
creamed coloured pyjamas.
I located the bathroom,
brushed my teeth and washed
my face. Then went the the
living room. Everywhere was
still as untidy as it was last
night, what was i expecting?
That angels would tidy my
room? No way!!! I don’t even
believe in them.
Ooops sorry i forgot to
introduce my self! Am Isaiah,
Isaiah Guidotti from a family
of four, dad is the mayor of
cebu and mum, a business
woman. I have only one
sibling, my pearl, Isabella. I
was born 27years ago. I spent
all my life in cebu city,
actually, its only yesterday i
stepped out of cebu for the
first time. I came down here,
to Manila, the capital city of
philippine, to work. Dad had
that taken care of, so i can
start working as soon as i wish.
*phone rings*
The caller is no other than
samuel my best friend.
Samuel: hey bro
me: yeah! How are you doing?
Samuel: i’m doing good….how
was your first night in Manila?
(laughing)
me: it wasn’t peaceful at all,
Manila is a noisy city!!!
Samuel: hahahaha welcome to
Manila don’t worry, you’d get
used to it…..by the way am
coming over, like right now!
Me: (happy) thats nice, but
come prepared, you’ar gonna
help me do some tidy-ups.
Samuel: exactly why i’m
coming….catcha then?
Me: i’d be waiting, bye.
*hunged up*
That was samuel, my best
friend. We grew up together,
attended the same high school
in cebu, but after high school,
he came down here to Manila
to live with his family, while i
attened college in cebu.
I started doing some of the
tidying, fixing the kitchen,
putting the couches in place
and so on.
Just then, i heard a knock on
the door, of course i don’t
need a seer to tell me its
samuel. I ushered him in, not
after a friendly handshake.
Me: buddy, i’ve got nothing to
offer yet….(shy)
samuel: i understand, lets fix
your house for now, when we
are done, i’d take you out, we
eat, have fun and show you
new places, yeah?
Me: yeah! Thanks man.
Minutes drifted to hours, soon
we were done putting the
house in order. Samuel called
an engineer to take care of the
power, which he did pretty
well, guess he must be an
expert. Samuel and i went to a
fast food restaurant in the next
street, M, de santos street,
while i live at Soriano avenue.
We ate some local (philippine)
food and also visited some fun
parks. Then to samuel’s family
house where i was given a
warm welcome.
The day moved really fast, its
7:34pm already! I’m not the
type that stays out late, i asked
samuel to take me home.
Samuel had a car of his own,
and lives in a mansion, his
parents are filthy rich and he’s
their only child. A little wonder
he is a spoilt brat.
Samuel dropped me at the
entrance to my house, before
zooming off. I went in and sat
on the sofa to breath down for
a while. I was kinda tired
luckily i don’t have to cook, i
ate a delicious meal made by
samuel’s mum herself!!!
I switched on the tv a soap
tittled ‘rivers of love’ was
being played. I liked the
display of love and affection
showered by Coco Martins (a
philippin actor) in the soap. I
unconsciously wished it was
me been flooded by ‘rivers of
love’ yes i did had a
relationship back then, but i’d
never describe that as rivers of
love, rather ‘desert of love’
yeah ‘coz i don’t know if the
love actually existed.
The soap ended a few minutes
to 9pm, not after leaving a
great suspense. I was also
getting sleepy, but just as i
envisaged, the sounds of rock
music, various degrees of car
hootings and what sounded
like gunshots, won’t let me
have a blissful night rest.
I shouldn’t have opted to stay
in the heart of Manila, but hey!
I want some adventures, i’ve
heard so much about MANILA.

>>

A man is doing push ups on the beach, Santa sees him and starts laughing loudly and says, “Sorry to tell you but the women below you has already left.”Related

My experience with Ray thought me a very big lesson
– money for hand, back for ground – a new era of pay
before service.
The experience shattered the reverence I had for the
spiritualist and I started feeling he was scam.
My roommate stella could be innocent after all but that
wasn’t my major problem.
I needed strong powers to fortify myself against all
odds.
I had lost a lot of money and my life wasn’t as safe as
I thought. I needed protection against people like Ray
and Chief Adeboye.
So I visited one babalawo a friend recommended for
me and explained my desire to him.
“The first three men you sleep with after you leave this
place, bring their c0nd0ms here with their sp€rms
inside,” he instructed looking intently at me.
“Ok baba I heard you,” I replied rising.
Bringing the c0nd0ms with the sp€rms inside wasn’t
difficult. All I did was pretend like I was going to flush
the c0nd0m down the toilet then hide it in my
handbag.
The difficult aspect came when the babalawo poured
the sp€rms into one small bowl and instructed me to
drink it.
I hesitated for some time staring at the mixture. The
mixture was yellowish and milky with an awful smell.
I brought the cup to my face two times but the smell
wouldn’t allow me.
“Don’t you need protection and power again?” The
babalawo asked staring at me with some air of
disappointment.
“Baba I need the power and protection,” I replied still
staring at the mixture.
“Then drink nah and stop wasting my time!” He
bawled.
“The power I need is the “DO AS I SAY POWER” to
make my clients do my wish and bidding without
argument,” I explained.
“Drink the mixture first nah,” the baba commanded
frowning.
I drank the mixture and nearly vomited.
“Don’t try it!” The baba warned. “If you vomit, then
everything will be rendered useless.”
I struggled to restrain myself but the sour taste of the
sp€rms kept stimulating the vomiting centre in my
brain.
I tried and tried, no way. I sat up, no way. I stood up,
no way.
With one long retch, I vomited everything unto the floor
to the utmost dismay of the Babalawo…

>> Episode 18 -

Teenage Love. [Read it]


**PART ONE**
CHAPTER 1…….
It was a bright saturday morning
on the 7th of september 2013.
Akinola oluwasegun was walking
along a popular street in Ibadan,
Oyo state. He was dressed in a
white T-shirt and a black pant
trouser and a black vickers shoe.
He was on his way to Loyola
College, a government owned
secondary school around Agodi
gate GRA Ibadan for his WAEC GCE
exam.
He entered into the school
compound and walked towards
the school building. Being his
first paper English Language, he
had no idea of where the
examination hall was situated.
So, he had to ask for help from
other candidates who had come
the previous days for chemistry
practicals and Commerce. He
walked up to a girl seated on the
staircase reading to ask for the
help.
“Hello, good morning.” he
greeted.
“Good morning.” she replied.
“Please, are you here for exam?”
he asked.
“Yeah.” she replied.
“Okay. Please, which way is the
examination hall.” He asked.
“I don’t know. This is my first
time here.” She answered.
(disappointed) “Okay, lets ask
others the way to the exam hall.”
He adviced.
“Okay.” She replied standing up
and dusting her skirt.
*TEN MINUTES LATER*
The invigillator walked into the
exam hall carrying a green sack
with the inscription; WEST
AFRICAN EXAMINATION COUNCIL.
No 62. He was accompanied by
five teachers of the school.
A laptop was removed and with
a thumb printing device attached
to it.
“Line up for your biometrics.”
one of the teachers barked.
After the completion of the
biometrics. The candidates were
asked to sit down according to
their numbers. The answer
booklets and the question
papers were first distributed
before the attendance was
marked. The paper lasted two
and a half hours. The paper
ended by 11:30am and they
were given 3hours break before
the commencement of the paper
2&3(objectives & the Test of
Orals respectively).
Outside the examination hall,
students were seen in group,
some in fours, in fives and so on
discussing and arguing over the
just concluded paper.
Oluwasegun(segun for short)
wast sitting alone under a big
three near the school football
pitch. He was flipping through
the pages of the WAEC English
language past question. Just then
someone tapped him from
behind. He looked up and saw
his cousin Omolayo Akinola.
He stood up and hugged her.
“What are you doing here?” he
asked.
“I came to greet my friends
writing their exam here. She
answered.
“Where is your centre?”
“Ikolaba grammar school.”she
replied.
“Most of my friends are in that
centre.”he said.
“Are you the only one here?” she
asked.
“Yes, am the only one here from
my school.”he answered.
“You must be feeling lonely
o.”she said.
“Yeah”………
The gisted for like ten minutes
before Omolayo stood up to go,
“Let me introduce you to my
friends over there.” she said
pointing to a group of 2 boys
and 4 girls gisting.
He stood up and followed her
towards the group. Immediately
they saw them approach they
stopped talking.
“Where have you been? One of
her friends jummy asked
Omolayo suspiciously.
Ignoring her question. “Meet my
cousin, Segun. Segun meet my
friends.” she introduced.
“Hi guys.” he greeted.
“Hi.” They chorused.
They all hung around till it was
1:30pm, 30minutes before the
next paper.
“Bro, i think we should get going
so, we won’t be late.” Omolayo
said.
“Alright, bye. Segun answered.
Omolayo left with four of her
friends remaining two who were
also in segun’s centre. Among
which was Jummy.
–to be continued–


NAIRAJOKES.COM




Rate this story
Add Your Own Rating



Interesting



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Educative



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Unique



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%





Organization



0%
1%
2%
3%
4%
5%
6%
7%
8%
9%
10%
11%
12%
13%
14%
15%
16%
17%
18%
19%
20%
21%
22%
23%
24%
25%
26%
27%
28%
29%
30%
31%
32%
33%
34%
35%
36%
37%
38%
39%
40%
41%
42%
43%
44%
45%
46%
47%
48%
49%
50%
51%
52%
53%
54%
55%
56%
57%
58%
59%
60%
61%
62%
63%
64%
65%
66%
67%
68%
69%
70%
71%
72%
73%
74%
75%
76%
77%
78%
79%
80%
81%
82%
83%
84%
85%
86%
87%
88%
89%
90%
91%
92%
93%
94%
95%
96%
97%
98%
99%
100%







A guy goes to a bar & finds a 12 inch pianist on the piano He is surprised
& asks the bartender ..

“How come this guy who is 12 inch is here ? the bartender replies : I have a lamp form which a genie will appear & he will grant a wish”

This guy rubs the lamp & asks the genie ” I want one million bucks”

The genie says ” oaky in 5 minutes”

After 5 minutes thee are a million ducks.

This guy is irritated .. he goes to the bartender & says ” hey I didn`t ask the genie for million ducks .. I asked million bucks”

The bartender says, “Do u think I asked for a 12 inch pianist ???Related

Girl who has put her status “baby doll mein sone di” on whatsapp cannot be trusted ????Related
Next Page >>
<< Previous Page