Unlimited Jokes and Funny Moments:


THE UNEXPECTED LOVE
(Tochi in school)
Season 1
Episode 7
:
#THE_FOLLOWING_DAY
Melody hung her school bag and was ready to take off to school. Her uniform looks cleaned and ironed to the extent that the shape of her pant was seen through the green tight skirt.
"Melody!" the mother called and came out with a bunch of money. "This is your school fees" she handed it to her.
"Thank you, Mum" Melody collected it and walked away.
*
Tochi wore her uniform with a black shoe looking like a smart student. She was able to locally plaite her hair like other students in Winners International Secondary School. Her beauty began to showcase gradually.
"Mama!" she called coming out through a passage. Her mother couldn't believe how good she was looking in her uniform when she saw her.
"Tochim"
"Yes, mama"
"You look beautiful!"
"Thank you, mama. I will be going now"
"Won't you eat?"
"No, mama, I'm already late. Don't worry i have some money for my breakfast"
"Alright, learn well oh"
"Okay, Mama!" her voice echoed from the passage.
*
Just at the entrance of the school compound through a narrow road filled with bushes beside it, Melody discovered her school fees lost. She brought down her bag and scattered the books yet she couldn't find it. She saw a minor opening, then she concluded that the money must had fallen off through the opening.
"Oh God, I'm finished!" she exclaimed and began to walk back following the narrow road. Her eyes had already filled with tears waiting to drop at anytime. Just inbetween the road she saw Wisdom coming and both stared at each other...
*
Meanwhile, Jennifer and Calista were already in school just like other students. The time was just five minutes before assembly will take place.
Esther who had not seen Tochi or Wisdom began to walk to the other building of the senior section to check on them. She climbed a corridor and walked majestically with a white handkerchief in her hand. Her buttocks swung to and fro as she walked. She was very beautiful.
At the other end of the corridor, Calista and Jennifer were also walking like a queen and her maid. Jennifer disdained Esther and hissed when they met at the centre of the corridor.
"What was that for, Jennifer?" Esther asked.
"Did you hear your name?"
"But why exhibiting such character in my presence?"
Jennifer kept quiet and began to catwalk.
"Listen, don't try such thing again in my presence or i will show you were you belong" Esther concluded point at her with the handkerchief.
"You can't do anything, okay?!" Jennifer responded without looking at her.
*
Wisdom expected Melody to hiss and walk away as usual but she stood still looking at him with the tears that engulfed her eyes. After some moment without both of them greeting or saying anything, Wisdom passed her.
"Wisdom!" Melody called him back and he turned.
"What is it?"
"Please, did you see any money on your way coming?"
CONTUINE READING

You do not need to be jealous of other people’s life, just be confident and trust with your own life destiny.

~ Author UnknownRelated

Gupta ji ke Ghar Sharmaji aaye..



Guptaji Apne Bachhon ki Pehchaan karane Lage…



Ye Meri Beti RANI

Shadi Se Pehle Hum Mumbai mein “Rani Baag” Ghumne Jaaya karte thhe.. Uski Yaad mein Iska Naam Rani Rakha.



Sharmaji : Wah..Pyari Bitiya hai



Ye mera Beta TAJ,

Shadi ke 5 Saal baad Second Honeymoon pe Hum Agra gaye thhe.. uski yaad mein…



Sharmaji : Wah..bahot Sochke Naam Rakhe hai aapne..!



Aur yeh mera Chhota beta

KOHINOOR..



Sharmaji : Kya baat hai.! Matlab aap London mein kohinoor Heera dekh Aaye.?



Guptaji : Arey Nahi..

Hum toh Precaution Le Rahe thhe.. Lekin Iss Brand ne Dokha de diya.!!Related

MEN TAKE NOTE [Read it]


Don’t take a woman for granted if she is
giving you too much attention. Just consider
yourself lucky because maybe she loves you so
much that she doesn’t want anyone else to
take her place in your life
.
If she cries for you don’t think she is weak but
consider yourself lucky that she thinks you are
worth her precious tears .
.
If she is jealous of the other women around
you don’t think she is insecure but she
doesn’t want to see anyone else to be in your
arms.
.
If a woman says sorry to you even though its
not her fault don’t think she fears losing you
but she considers her relationship worth
another chance and she doesn’t want anyone
else to have your heart..
.
# LoveIsABeautifulThing


NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Before i could get myself to say something,
I was dragged and thrown into a waiting
police van, while Chioma pleaded to them to
let me be.
It was very sickening finding myself in such
terrible, bitter situation. My guilty conscience never allowed me say something
reasonable. Chioma was the person who did
all the talking, begging and screaming at
the officers to let me be.
“for God’s sake, leave the poor man alone. I
beg of you. He is a respectable gentleman. He can come to your station on his own”
she pleaded as they threw me at the back of
their van.
“do you wish to go with us?. That’s the only
way we can help. We are simply carrying
out orders” one of them said to her. She looked at me, breathed deeply with tears
melting her eyes, climbed into the back of
the van and joined me. I couldn’t believe my
eyes, i never knew she loved me that much.
“you shouldn’t have” i managed to murmur.
“don’t worry dear. I know you are a very innocent person. If i don’t stick with you at
this moment, then where is the love. I’m
your woman and it will always remain so”
she said confidently. I closed my eyes and
prayed for the terrible nightmare to go
away. “what if Mary is behind this outrageous
police arrest?. How do i now keep things
away from Chioma” i wondered miserably.
We got to the almost empty police station
at exactly 6:20pm. The lady corporal on
desk quickly grabbed my I.D card which one of the officers who arrested me threw at
her. She wrote down my name and some
other details from it, while an ugly looking
officer rudely undressed me. This time i
weakly fought and resisted the cold
treatment. Chioma screamed with anger. “what the hell is going on?. I swear i will
bring down this station with a team of
lawyers tomorrow. This is insanity and
abuse of my friend’s human rights” she
barked at the police woman as i tried my
possible best to avoid being undressed. “you can do whatever you want madam. We
are only carrying out instructions” she
replied Chioma, quickly taking record of my
belongings which were handed over to her.
Before i could argue once again, i found
myself inside a poorly lit cell. Holding the iron bar, backing and ignoring the seven
guys inside, i shouted at the top of my
voice begging to be released. My behaviour
seemed to have irritated my cellmates,
because few seconds later, I felt a terrible
thud at the back of my head which sent me turning to face my new enemies.
By the look on their faces i knew they were
delighted and amused, ready to have fun
with me. I knew a great beating awaited me,
but wasn’t ready to yield without a fight.

>>


Akpos`s wife was busy singing in the bedroom.

The following conversation ensued:

Akpos: You know my dear, when you sing like that I just wish you were on a radio.

Wife: (smiling) wow honey. Am I that good?

Akpos: No, at least on a radio I can change the station


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-15 21:45:37

274 Views



Na joke ne [Read it]


A Guy was called for an interview by Chevron
based on his performance while working for Shell.
The Interviewer
Akpos asked; What is your current pay at Shell
and what are you looking at with Chevron?
The Guy said; 9 Million Naira per annum plus
medical and other benefits. Considering the
position here in Chevron, I'd be looking at 20-22
Million Naira per annum, a status car, overseas
vacation and medicals.
Akpos said; Today is your lucky day! The position
comes with 35 Million Naira per annum salary,
2014 Range Rover Sport as official car, Mercedes
Benz S65 AMG as status car, overseas medical
treatment. A fully furnished house in Lekki, health
insurance for your wife and children, 2 houses to
be built for you in any town of your choice and in
your village, annual overseas vacation for you and
your family fully-paid first class, 2 Million Naira
wardrobe allowance per annum, cook, steward
and 2 drivers, country club membership, and you
are entitled to keep all that the company gives you
if you put in just 3 years of service. The Guy in
bewildered excitement exclaimed; Haaaa! Sir, you
must be joking.
Akpos said; Of course I am joking. Were you not
the one that started it?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-06-15 15:31:03

206 Views



josey [Read it]


Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school.
She often fell asleep and one day while she was
sleeping, the teacher asked her a question.
"Who is the creator of the universe?" Joe was
sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her
with a pin to wake her up. Josey jumped and
yelled, "God almighty!" The teacher
congratulated her. A little later the teacher
asked her another question, "Tell me who is
our lord and savior?" Joe poked Josey again
and she yelled out, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher
congratulated her again. Later on the teacher
asked, "What did Eve say to Adam after their
26th child?" Joe poked Josey again and she
shouted, "If you stick that thing in me again,
I'll snap it in half and stick it up your ass!"


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-07-13 17:00:00

535 Views




Ladki: Main Kal Tum Se Milne Nahi

Aa

Sakti. . .

.

Ladka: Chalo Mai Tumhara

Gift Kisi Or Ko De Deta Hun

.

.

.

.

.

Ladki: Mera Matlab Tha Kal Nahi Aa

Sakti

Abi Kaha Ho Tum ? , me aa rhi hu ????Related

BLIND BY NATURE EPISODE 20 (STORY BY DINDY)
please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story...

Aunty Grace: "[Talks super fast] But all I asked of you was that you should explain to me the concept in which you constructed the life that gives life, which I really enjoyed", she said.
Mrs Rose: "There, that's what I'm talking about, I do not bloody understand the words that escape your mouth", she said leaving the dinning table to the sitting room where Sam and Jack sat watching a movie.
Aunty Grace: ""[Talks super fast] Relax bond, what I said wasn't hard at it's peak, it is accessible to the brain break down", she said following Mrs Rose close behind.
Mrs Rose: "[Annoyed] Oh gosh!, Grace just let me be for crying out loud", she said throwing her hands up and down then stamping the ground with her foot as she walked into the sitting room then stood.
Aunty Grace: "Stop your excessive reactions, I was only trying to acquire more wisdom of the human race from you", she said to Mrs Rose her sister as she kept on following Mrs Rose behind then stood in front of her.
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> Sam and Jack attention shifted away from the movie which was on, to the real life scene between their mum and aunt.
Sam: "Hi bro, Who do you think will win this game bro", he said to Jack looking at his mum and aunt.
Jack: "Dude mum stands a chance to lose as usual", he said.
Sam: "Oh shit, aunty Grace is looking at us", he said turning his head back to the tv.
Jack: "Da*n, she is about to speak to us", he said then did what Sam did.
Aunty Grace: "Sam, Jack, can you younger race come over here and help me explain to your mum what I'm trying to word out", she said facing the direction which Sam and Jack sat.
[WRITER SPEAKS] Sam and Jack looked at themselves and were both confused, they didn't know what to replied her back with, for they knew that if they say anything wrongly she would use her hard heavy words on them which they won't be able to breakdown successfully.
Sam: "[Low voice] Jack we better make a ran for it now or else we would be dragged into a pool of endless drown", he said still facing the tv.
Jack: "[Low voice] I am way ahead of you bro, just follow my steps", he said then stood up so did Sam, they walked towards where aunty Grace stood.
Aunty Grace: "[Talks super fast] Good young generations, here they come to explain to you what you could not breakdown easily", she said facing Mrs Rose who was in front of her.
Mrs Rose: "Where are your so called 'younger generations?", she asked.
Aunty Grace: "[turns back and Talks super fast] Where are my younger generations? I just saw them moving unstoppable towards this side", she asked and spoke confusingly.
Mrs Rose: "[Laughs] I'm sorry to announce to you, but they ran away through that side when you faced me [Laughs]", she said descriptively.
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> Aunty Grace became speechless while Mrs Rose kept on laughing and laughing. Sam and Jack ran out of the house because they knew that was the only way to escape the claws of their aunty who was ready to skin them alive with her words.
.....BACK IN THE HOSPITAL.....
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> Julian was mute and sweat ran down her face, she didn't know what to say, she couldn't control the way she felt deep within her soft sweet heart.
[JULIAN'S THOUGHTS]=> What should I tell him? da*n I'm so afraid. Why do I feel this way, this is unlike me, i can't control myself, I better don't reply him.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] I know you are there, you just don't want to talk, but I assure you that if you don't talk I will scream", he said.
[JULIAN'S THOUGHT]=> I have to just speak up, I don't want him to scream and stress himself more, it would just be unfair.
Julian: "[Calm voice] It's me Julian", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Oh you, why didn't you speak up when I asked you who you were?", he asked her.
Julian: "[Calm voice] I was thinking of something, my mind wasn't here", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Ok then, if I may ask, what were you thinking of that made your heart beat so fast?", he asked.
Julian: "[Confused] I was thinking of where my dad went to", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Why are you lying?", he asked.
Julian: "[Surprised] I don't understand", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] I heard when your dad whispered to you that he was going to see the doctor", he said.
Julian: "[Smiles] So you gat good hearing ability like me", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Wait, so you are blind too?", he asked.
Julian: "[Smiles] Yes I am, how did you know?", she asked.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] I figured it out myself with what you said", he said to her.
Julian: "[Smiles] Don't you think you need to rest, you sound so weak", she said playing with her long hair.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] I agree with you, but I find it hard to rest", he said.
Julian: "Why so?", she asked.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] My past memories which I find hard to remember gat me on a long journey of thoughts", he said.
Julian: "Just relax, it will come to you little by little with time, if you push your brain too hard it won't be able to give you what you really want", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] You are so right, but maybe if I could remember something connected to my past it would help alot", he said.
Julian: "I wish I could help you out", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Yes you can", he said to her.
Julian: "How?", she asked.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] The doctor must have told you and your dad something about my present state right?", he asked.
Julian: "Yes he did", she said.
Celestin: "[Coughs then Talks slowly] Can you please tell me what he said", he said.
Julian: "You sound so weak, please rest ok?", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Ok I will, but first, tell me what the doctor told you", he said.
Julian: "Ok, he told us that your blood cells and tissues were fast to heal and you couldn't remember things due to the accident, he also told us that your cause of blindness might have been acid, due to the way your eyes are", she said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Hmmm, that doesn't ring a bell in my head at all", he said.
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> Julian and Celestin kept on talking learning more things about themselves while Mr Smart and the doctor were discussing about Celestin.
Doctor: "Well sir, I don't know what to do about that but one thing is for sure, he can't stay here forever", he said.
Mr Smart: "I know, he will stay with me sir immediately he is dismissed from here", he said.
Doctor: "That's a good idea", he said.
Mr Smart: "My house is spacious and well ventilated filled with flowers and trees, it would help him recover faster", he said.
Doctor: "You are right, patients with lost memories need a place like that to reveal back to normal", he said.
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> After they spoke and conclude about Celestin's matter, they both went to see him in the room where he was kept.
Julian's: "[Laughs] Celestin you are so funny [Laughs]", she said.
Celestin: "Nah I'm not so funny", he said.
Doctor: "[Walks in] Oh, you are still awake Celestin?", he asked as Mr Smart walked in.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Yes doc, I couldn't rest", he said.
Julian: "[Smiling seriously] I kept him company", she said.
Mr Smart: "Hmm, I guess it's time to go Julian", he said.
Doctor: "You still need to rest Mr Celestin", he said.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Ok doc, well Julian it was nice meeting and talking to you", he said.
Julian: "[Smiles] Same here Celestin", she called his name in a lovely way.
Mr Smart: "Good bye Celestin", he said as he assisted Julian to stand on her feet.
Doctor: "Celestin, please rest, ok?", he said leaving the room with Mr Smart and Julian.
Celestin: "[Talks slowly] Ok doc", he said as he closed his blind eyes to rest his body.
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> Julian left with smile all over her face, Smart noticed the smile but said nothing. Celestin couldn't rest, he tried as much as possible to remember what his past hid from him, his thoughts were deep and hard.
[CELESTIN SPEAKS]=> I just wish I could remember all that happened in my past, it would help me alot. Julian said something about acid being poured on my eyes, Acid!.....
Celestin: "[Screams] Ah!, my...head!", he exclaimed in pain holding his head.
[WRITER SPEAKS]=> Celestin started having flashbacks, Immediately after he mentioned the word "acid" (in his head). All his past were coming back to his memory causing his head to ache very bad, he turned from left to right because It felt like his head was going to explode like a time-bomb. The pain was too much for him to withstand so he fainted.......to be continue.
STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI
contact me on
Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433
Email: [email protected]
or
Email: [email protected]
Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi
Skype: 07087750433
or
Skype: [email protected]
Twitter: @nnamdiossy
INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi


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It’s tough being a politician. Half your reputation is ruined by lies; the other half is ruined by the truth.Related

A lamp doesn’t speak, it simply introduces itself through its light.

Achievers never expose themselves but their achievements speak for them!Related

1.Man wey Unclad no dey put hand for pocket
loose translation:Youcan't do somethings if there are no certain conditions.
2.Chicken wey run way from borno go Ibadan go still end up inside pot of soup
loose translation:YouCan't Run Away From Your Destiny
3.Today’s newspaper na tomorrow Suya wrap. loose translation:Keep calm! Nothing last forever
4.Cow wey dey in a hurry to go America go come back as corn beef
loose translation:Just be patient. Let the game come to you. Don't rush!
5.Akara and moin moin get the same parent na wetin dey pass tru make dem diffrent
loose translation:Howyou start doesn't matter,what matters is how you finish.
6.Wetin concern agbero with twitter handle,or malu/ cow with face cap?
loose translation:Mind your business.
7.If life dey show you pepper,my guy make pepper soup from am loose translation:Make something good out of a bad experience
8.I get am before Nor be property
loose translation: stop living in the past and start living in the present.
9.If person too tey for party e go follow dem wash plate
loose translation: Dn't outstay your welcome
10.Rolling stone,ofcourse na person push am now!
loose translation:There is always a reason for
something
11.Craze no hard to form,na the trekking be wahala loose translation:Easier said than done
12.No matter how hot your tempa be,e no fit boil beans.
loose translation:Calm down,your temper won't solve the problem
13.Every mallam with em own kettle,every Northerner with em own radio. loose translation:Every man for himself
14.You no need cutlery to chop slap
loose translation:Youdon't need my translation to understand this,lol
15.Okpolo eye no be open eye loose translation: Having Big eyes doesn't make you civilised,lol
16.Leave matter for Mathias and Sabi for Sabinus....loose translation:Give everyone what they deserve.
17.Bring suya, bring suya,.......na cow body dey suffer am. loose translation:Every action has a consequence
18.E go better na e go better,na im make ibo man still dey Kano loose translation:When there is hope,there is Life


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-01-14 22:45:33

396 Views




Remember when your
primary school teacher
told you that you're
good for nothing but
now you are the admin
of three Whatsapp
groups? My brother,
You made it!......,.,...,.,..,..,...,..,.....
SELFISHNESS is when u post joke expecting more than 20 comment but vow that u will never comment on other people jokes. Lets make this site more lively by commenting nt only by posting.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-07 11:14:45

383 Views




Stephanie: who did this to my room?
Chioma: why did they turn your room upside down
Stephanie: i don't know
Chioma: look at this note(She look at it)stay away from Desmond;if you still love your life
Stephanie: who must have done this?
Chioma: your phone is ringing
Stephanie: but there is no number
Chioma: pick it up
Stephanie: hello

Unknown: i thought you won't pick
Stephanie: who are you and who gave you my number?
Unknown: lets just say your special friend that is outside. have you seem my little present for you?
Stephanie: you are a monster;are you the one that break into my house?
Unknown: hey girlfriend;keep quiet and listen carefully,stay away from Desmond,if not i will act really bad
Stephanie: you can't do me anything
Unknown: lets see(he close the door)
Stephanie: Jesus!who is there?
Unknown: lets say your shadow. that is to show you that i can get you down (call end)
Chioma: what is going on?
Stephanie: Chioma;i am scared,i just wish is not Georgina doing this again
Chioma: what do you mean Georgina?as she done this before now?
Stephanie: um...uh...not at all. i was just thinking who will want me to stay away from Desmond?
Chioma: oh that!i don't think this place is save for you
Stephanie: what do i do?should i go to my mom?
Chioma: it has not gotten to that;you can go to Anita
Stephanie: okay later;i should be on my way

Alfred: you all are always ganging up on us
Ayo: that is woman character for you
Anita: we are not,is just that you all seems to look at this in one way
Ann: yes;that is it
Desmond: that is not the issue;you all really don't understand men. you won't even bothered to know their like and dislike
Tunde: that is the truth
Tina: i disagree
Tosin: why?
Tina: i know he is going to support his brother
Tosin: it is the truth
Stephanie: am sorry;i didn't know is a full house
Anita: you know you are always welcome
Tina: are we save or did you have any unwanted visitor in your house?
Stephanie: what?
Tina: what i meant is that you only need people around only when you have problem
Stephanie: i don't have any problem
Tosan: alright welcome
Stephanie: pardon my bad matters;good afternoon
Alfred: afternoon;how are you?
Stephanie: am fine
Ann: alright;lets play a game
Alfred: what kind of game
Ann: i will spin the bottle on the table whoever it face the person will choose between truth and consequence
Tosin: and
Ann: if you choose truth;whatever question you are asked you must say the truth and consequence;whatever you are asked to do you must do it
Tosan: i like it
Alfred: i think i like it also
Anita: alright;it seems everyone like it
Ayo: so let the game began
Tosan: Tina should do the asking
Tina: alright(she spin the bottle)whoa!is Ann;are you ready?
Ann: sure
Tina: truth or consequence
Ann: consequences
Tina: bark like a very big dog(she bark) and laud(she bark)next
Ann: you are crazy. its Anita
Tina: Truth or consequence
Anita: truth
Tina: how many carry over did you have in your first semester
Anita: one
Ayo: so you did have carry over and you didn't tell me?
Anita: you never did asked(she spin again)
Tina: Ayo;truth or consequence
Ayo: truth
Tina: how many girlfriend did you have?
Ayo: just one after i break up with my ex and you already know her(laughed all)
Tina: (she spin the bottle)Alfred your turn
Alfred: truth
Tina: won't you wait for me to asked
Alfred: no
Tina: alright;how old are you?
Alfred: twenty
Ann: whoa oh
Tina: it seems some people are going to be fortunate(she spin again)Desmond
Desmond: what?
Tina: truth or consequence
Desmond: truth
Tina: who did you have your first crush on?
Tunde: that is not involved
Tina: is a question
Alfred: go ahead answer it
Desmond: is...(he stared at Stephanie)uh...Georgina
Tina: why her?i thought it was.....
Desmond: remember it was just a question not two
Tina: fine(she spin the bottle)my fortunate day. Stephanie
Stephanie: what?am not involved
Tosan: you can't bark out now
Stephanie: i really....
Anita: come on
Stephanie: fine
Tina: Truth or consequence
Stephanie: consequence
Tina: i dare you to kiss Desmond
Stephanie: are you crazy?
Tina: is a game
Stephanie: what kind of stupid game is that?
Tosan: Tina;why would you say such a thing?
Tina: like i said nothing attach,is just a game. come on do it
Stephanie: i can't just count me out(she walked away)
Desmond: what were you thinking asking her to do that?
Tina: what is the big deed?
Tunde: there is a big deed
Tina: was it because i didn't asked her to kiss you?
Tunde: you are unbelievable (exit Desmond) why do you like hurting her?

Desmond: Stephie
Stephanie: yes
Desmond: what is wrong with you?
Stephanie: nothing
Desmond: are you sure?
Stephanie: of cause;what happen to you when you got home?
Desmond: here yo go again;changing the topic
Stephanie: come on
Desmond: is the usual way;i had a fight with my mom and even her dad
Stephanie: your granddad?but why?
Desmond: he always want to take side with his daughter
Stephanie: what did your dad do?
Desmond: i just added more pains to dad
Stephanie: what did you do?
Desmond: every time my dad sees me,i always remind him of himself. why is life like that;does you are in love with,your family will never approve of it?

Stephanie: i still don't get you. who is in love with someone his family never did approve
Desmond: dad is in love with his formal course mate
Stephanie: when he was in school?
Desmond: yes
Stephanie: why did he not marry her?
Desmond: grandpa wanted dad to marry my mom
Stephanie: what a pity?so what happen to the girl?
Desmond: she take her life
Stephanie: what?
Desmond: yes;she did;dad was a failure just like me,he is never able to fight for the one he love,just like me
Stephanie: you are not like him,the fact that your dad can't fight for the one he love that doesn't mean that;he is a failure and you both are different because people you love you always protect,look at the both of us for instance;we are just friends yet you protect me and Georgina;you are in love with her;that is why even though you two quarrel you still remain together and i know you are not going to hurt her because you are in love with her and even your sisters
Desmond: you don't get it;am in love with someone else
Stephanie: are you kidding?
Desmond: am serious(he take a deep breath and draw closer to her)am in love with .....
Stephanie: go on tell me(he stared into her eyes and at her lips)no secret;tell me
Desmond: don't get mad at me;if i tell you?
Stephanie: why should i?as long as she will never come between us?
Desmond: never;is....(he pick her hand and place it close to his lips)am in love with....
Tunde: guy;lets go home
Stephanie: hold on;he want to tell me something
Tunde: maybe next time;not today
Desmond: alright;take care(he peck her by the nose)
Stephanie: you too;bye
Tunde: bye
Stephanie: could it be;that girl i saw kissing him. that should bothered me because i was told to stay away from him


Alfred: i just wonder
Ayo: about what?
Alfred: she said is a game and whereas she was annoying people with it
Desmond: at first;i thought she has out grown that stupidness
Alfred: i wonder what she was thinking asking you that question?
Desmond: she is crazy and crazy people don't think
Ayo: where is Tunde?
Alfred: i don't know
Tosin: i haven't see him since last night
Desmond: what did you mean since last night and did he not eat this morning?
Alfred: no he didn't;he has not been himself since we came back from Tina last night and that was the last time i saw him
Desmond: why should he be disturbing himself over that stupid girl;if i were him,i will look for someone else
Tosin: see who is talking?why haven't you look for someone else
Desmond: if i was the one that pick Gina;i won't think twice before telling her to go
Ayo: you are crazy
Desmond: am not;am just speaking my mind. am with her in order not to fail my parents;not to cause my dad pains and to make my mom happy
Alfred: do you think you are doing it for your mom's happiness or for her to love you?
Desmond: gone are those days;when mom things and it hurts me;i always ended up getting drunk just to forget my sorrow but now is no longer like that because i realised that getting drunk only give me a brief relief and for my mom's love is of no used because an too old to be looking for that
Alfred: i notice that the highest you could do is to frown
Desmond: yes because life is too short to think about stupid things. excuse me

Ayo: out of all the pains he had gone through in life;he never lost focus
Alfred: and never get fed up completely
Tison: even when so many things push him down
Ayo: he is a fighter
Alfred: yes


Desmond: Tunde;can i sit with you?
Tunde: sure
Desmond: here is a glass of juice(he hand him a glass)
Tunde: you don't have to
Desmond: we are siblings even though we are not from the same parents. your dad is my uncle
Tunde: i know that and your dad is my uncle;nothing is changing it
Desmond: are you sure nothing is changing it
Tunde: i am
Desmond: then what is going on with you?
Tunde: nothing(he stand to leave)
Desmond: i thought you said we are siblings and that makes us family
Tunde: yes we are;aren't we?i get drunk you get drunk;my dad get drunk but i don't know if your dad and Dan's dad also get drunk. so you see we are indeed family
Desmond: yes we all get drunk but that is not what i am talking about(he sit down) i know you are going through pains;you can tell me
Tunde: of what use is it?when the cause of my pains have no cure(enter Tina)
Desmond: no pain have no cure. are you still in love with Stephie
Tunde: what kind of question is that?
Desmond: go on and answer me and i want you to be sincere
Tunde: we are not kids;we can handle ourselves right?
Desmond: yes;just go ahead and answer me
Tunde: yes;am in love with Stephanie but don't get me wrong all those times i see you two together i feel like dying;i wish i was you because with all the pains in your life;you are still happy;you are still the fortunate one among the both of us;when grandpa used to compare the both of us;i always feel bad even with all the ill treatment you are still the handsome one;the one with the wealthy family;the one with the kind heart and the one with the girl with a good heart. i wish for all the things you have but then i just don't get them
Desmond: you have everything i wish for;all i wish for;which is a lot of people who love you;unlike me(Tina cry and walk away)

Tunde: you don't get it;i just want one love that is Stephanie
Desmond: (enter Georgina) yes;you already have it;why look for it?
Tunde: brother;please don't get blinded by her words,can't you see she care for you and that is what we call love and she trust you not to hurt. she comfort with you,whenever she is around you;she feels you will protect her

Desmond: Tunde;don't start love and care are different
Tunde: you love her right?
Desmond: what?do we really have to go through that again?
Tunde: just be sincere with me and answer me
Desmond: its okay;yes;am also in love with her
Georgina: Jesus(she walked away with tears in her eyes)
Desmond: who is there?(he check)
Tunde: am not sure anyone is there
Desmond: alright
Tunde: so

Desmond: i am but don't worry;i will never do anything to hurt you or to stand in the way of Stephie's happiness. i know she loves you and that is the only thing i can give her for the help she had given me but please don't hurt her
Tunde: what about your feelings?
Desmond: do i really have to spit everything out?i will marry Gina because I realised that she is the one for me and Stephie is for you and everyone will be happy right?problem solve
Tunde: that is not what i want you to tell me
Desmond: don't you want to be happy?(phone ringing) excuse me;let me take this call
Tunde: fine;who is it?
Desmond: is Stephie;hello


Stephanie: Desmond;please come out;am scared people are after me. i don't know(she cry on the phone)
Desmond: i still don't get you;slow down
Stephanie: please come out(she end the call)
Tunde: what is going on?
Desmond: is like Stephie is in trouble
Tunde: do you need my help
Desmond: don't worry i can handle it(he run out with out his car)
Tunde: alright



READ MORE.....


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Stephanie: come here baby;you are my friend
Rod: really
Stephanie: yes
Rod: why are you crying?
Stephanie: i am not crying
Rod: tell me
Stephanie: Desmond;slapped me
Rod: why?
Stephanie: is because i did something bad
Rod: alright;sorry
Stephanie: is okay;what do you want to do?(enter Desmond)not again
Desmond: what did you say?
Stephanie: nothing
Desmond: i want to talk to you
Stephanie: what about?Baby;can you excuse us first
Rod: alright

Desmond: what is wrong with you?why would you allow a boy that you don't know to kiss you in public?it doesn't tell well of a decent girl. i really don't mean to hurt you but you kept telling lies and it hurt me
Stephanie: are you done?
Desmond: is that what you are suppose to say?
Stephanie: what were you expecting?that i tell you that i didn't mean it or i meant it?
Desmond: that is not what i meant
Stephanie: don't start please;try as much as possible to avoid me and i will do same. excuse me

Tom: excuse me;
Joy: what can i do for you my prince?
Tom: is that girl your sister
Joy: no;she is just a girl that my family is helping
Tom: really
Joy: yes;she also have a brother they lost their way and they ended up in this town far away from home
Tom: i like that;meaning they will not travelling soon
Joy: yes;my prince sorry if i may asked;do you like her?
Tom: yes;i want to be my girl
Joy: it will be difficult because her brother will not let her come out of the hut
Tom: why?
Joy: he does not want her to get into trouble
Tom: can you take me to her
Joy: i can't my prince;my brother will be mad at me
Tom: please;i will give you money
Joy: alright;follow me

Time: ma;why did you bring the prince here?
Joy: shut up;go call me Stephanie
Stephanie: what is he doing here?
Joy: the prince want to see you
Stephanie: what for?
Ton: how are you?
Stephanie: do i look sick?

Tom: i know you are not
Stephanie: then stop asking me foolish question. just leave before my brother comes in
Tom: i will not;i want to see your brother
Stephanie: suit yourself(he held her hand)
Desmond: don't you have respect for others (he pushed the prince) don't you have limitation?get out
Christian: relax man
Desmond: tell him to get out
Tom: i am sorry;i held your sister hand and i kissed her;i really didn't mean to and my guard put her in danger
Desmond: but you have done all of that;you can leave not that you state your mission
Tom: i am sorry;i just want her to be my friend
Desmond: and she doesn't want to be your friend. get lost
Tom: let her answer it herself
Desmond: you are insane;i said go(he pushed him again)

Stephanie: Desmond;is alright;just let him be
Desmond: just shut up and get inside
Stephanie: just go home
Tom: but you have not answer my question
Stephanie: what question
Tom: will you be my girl?
Christian: what?
Desmond: this man is a clown. just go
Tom: please say yes(she laugh)you are laughing at me?
Stephanie: you are funny;that is not how to court a girl
Tom: what does that mean?
Stephanie: what i meant is that;if you want a girl to be your....
Desmond: shut up;as for us get out of here
Christian: i am sorry my prince;please my prince just go
Tom: is alright;i will leave Christian: who brought him here?
Joy: i did
Christian: why?
Joy: he said,:he want to talk to her
Christian: are you crazy?
Joy: no
Desmond: is alright;just let her be
Joy: thank you

Anita: what is going on?you don't call me;you don't return my calls when i call you even when you see my missed call and to crown it all;you don't pick or even asked after me
Ayo: i am busy
Anita: busy;this is the time i needed you most in my life and all you could do is turn your back on me
Ayo: will you stop acting?is not like you are sick or you lost your dad or mom
Anita: are you alright?my friend is missing and you think is nothing
Ayo: was it important
Anita: are you sure you don't smoke?
Ayo: i do all because of you. you drive me crazy even if both of you are lesbian must you involve me in your stupidity
Anita: what did you called me?
Ayo: you heard me right
Anita: who told you that rubbish
Ayo: i know;i just hide it inside
Anita: you are a bastard
Ayo: and you are a slot(he pushed her) its over
Anita: i am sorry
Alfred: what is going on?
Ayo: asked her

Alfred: can someone talk to me and why are you crying?
Anita: he just break up with me and called me a lesbian
Alfred: what?he is crazy;just stop crying everything will be fine . don't you know big girls don't cry(she laughed)now you are acting like the big girl you are
Anita: you are funny,thanks(he hugged her)
Ann: what is going on here?
Alfred: is nothing baby
Ann: nothing and you are hugging her
Anita: i hope;you are not implying what i am thinking
Ann: i am not talking to you
Alfred: Ann baby;will you stop acting
Ann: i am not acting because i am not Tina
Tina: what are you driving out?
Ann: i hold you no explanation. so get off my case
Alfred: i really don't understand Ann is more matured than this
Anita: is okay;i know she didn't mean it
Tina: will you girls talk to me
Alfred: is alright;i will leave you two
Tina: what is it?
Anita: Ann saw me hugging Alfred and she got mad for nothing
Tina: why will you say she got mad for nothing when you are having an affair with Alfred
Anita: madness runs in your vein
Tina: i know but yours is still more than mine
Anita: having a conversation with you;is like having a conversation with an idiot
Tina: ha ha ha!this is just the beginnings,as far as i don't have fiance;you all will never be happy too and you all will never have one also
Stephanie: Joy told me that you have an injury when my brother pushed you
Stephanie: is nothing;is just a little wound
Stephanie: i am sorry
Tom: i have heard
Stephanie: i am really sorry;i did not really mean to make jest of you
Tom: i don't understand slow down
Stephanie: fine;i am sorry forgive me
Tom: is fine with me
Stephanie: meaning we are okay?
Tom: yes;bye
Stephanie: wait,what is your name
Tom: prince Tom but you can call me Tom
Stephanie: my name is Stephanie and thanks for that day
Tom: is nothing
Stephanie: friends right?
Tom: yes friends
Stephanie: alright
Tom: bye
Guard 1: you two are now friends
Tom: a little
Guard 1: the king want yo see you
Tom: alright

Desmond: young lady;where are you coming from
Stephanie: i took a walk
Desmond: okay
Stephanie: i am sorry i yelled at you,walk out on you;disobey you;talk to the prince when you asked me not to;do things you said i shouldn't do but i am really sorry
Desmond: is okay;you and i are the only things we got;it is just you and i. if you want to make friend with the prince fine but be careful
Stephanie: i will;he is a nice person,i am sure if you get to know him;you will like him
Desmond: is alright
Stephanie: that means we are good
Desmond: hmm
Stephanie: meaning yes right?
Desmond: right;come here(he embrace her)
Stephanie: i missed you









NAIRAJOKES.COM




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Big results require big ambitions.

~ Heraclitus of EphesusRelated

BLOOD TYPE [Read it]


So me and my friends were debating
about AS and AA blood type... Next day,
I asked my mum about my blood type: ME: Good morning mummy. MUMMY: Good morning my son. How are
you? ME: I'm fine mum. What blood type am
I? MUMMY: Blood of Jesus.
#BOLLY_SMART®


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-26 13:38:54

370 Views




Continue part******

TEN YRARS AGO

I have worked hard all my life to give myself a wonderful future, all my days in the university I have try to stay peaceful with others, I helped as many people I come across, even if I knew it won't Change what I did but doing good might make my nightmare go away.

Yes ever since I did what I did to lmada I have been having sleepless night,I could dream of my death yes my own death,it was always the same,I talked to my pastor about it even if I didn't tell him my secret, not that I never wanted to but I just want to keep my past behind me,I did all I could until it finally stopped,I was so happy when it did not knowing it could come to past.

I had everything within some few years of hard work,just one remaining thing was what brought me to the state I am now,I couldn't imagine that one little mistake of a man would destroy a man's wealth. I am in great pain of course I am who wouldn't be,who ever hear my sin will hate me,I have carried that guilt all my life.that was the reason I nevered engage in any relationship but with mimi what I felt was different so different and I wish I have nevered felt it.

INTO THE PRESENT

I see fleshes of images and whisperings, I couldn't pick where I was,my whole body was heavy, my breathing was heavy that I could hear the sound of my breath, my eyes was wide open but it wasn't clear,now I hear shouting but couldn't hear what the shouting was all about,my head was shaking it feel Iike was falling from an unknown planet, I could feel the warm touch on my hands,now another on my eyes,what was going on I didn't know,then black out.

I open my eyes again this time I was seeing clearly, it was a small room with a cupboard on the right and window on the left,there were two chairs close to my bed,the colour of the chair was the same with the window and door,I try to calculate where I was but couldn't, I was awake but my mind was till far,a lady in white walked in carrying a tray,she smiled at me,now I know where I was,her uniform said it all,I tryed to speak but couldn't find the words to say,she told be to rest that the doctor was on his way not long a man with a longer coat walked in, he remove something that was placed in my mouth and nose,immediately I found my voice that was when I knew I was placed in an oxygen, "please where am I" I managed to say. "You are in the hospital you were involved in an accident it is by the grace of God that you are till alive"he said smiling.

Accident, I till didn't get what he was saying,I asked him how and where,it was after his description that I started getting my memory back,so I am till alive,indeed God didn't want my soul for now I thought to myself, "please I need to go to the office I have am important meeting to get to" I said try to get up but was push back on the bed by the doctor, "there will be no need for that the meeting could have been handle by now" the doctor words made no sense to me "what do you mean doctor",I asked him because I really need an answer, "you have been in coma for six month now", WHAT... me coma for six months, is this doctor playing trick on me or what,I till didn't believe him,I tried moving my legs but I wasn't feeling it,this is unusual "doctor I can't feel my legs" I said looking straight to him eyes, "am sorry,but you had problem with your spinal cord,it was affected, you can't be able to walk but there is a 50/50 percent chances you might walk again", the doctor words came as a shock I couldn't believed my ear,me paralleled, am I dreaming or what, I didn't know what to say,I just lay down looking at the ceiling.

Many thoughts came on my mind, is this real,I won't be able to walk again, my life,my work,God what have I done to deserved this punishment, just one mistake just one, what is now left,I am no longer a complete man, I didn't know when I broke down in tear.

Leave your comments
And read Next part




NAIRAJOKES.COM




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PART 1

1. If your girlfriend comes to your house and join you in drinking garri, marry her.

2. If you take her to a restaurant and she picked gala/satchet-water instead of expensive meals, she's understanding, marry her.

3. If she sees someone with a Bugati but she decided to follow you with 'keke', my brother, na your bone be that.

4. If both of you enter a taxi or bus and she pays, that's a good sign.

5. She comes to your house and wash even your brothers and sisters clothes, my brother, she's yours.

6. You gave her 50k for shopping and she went for 'okirika' and she brings back 45k to you, marry her because she read Economics.

7. She calls you everyday and ask if you need airtime, brother claim her o.

8. If the girl use to give you her pocket money everyweek, she loves you, marry her.
 

PART 2

I don't know y I disagree with all dese points.But let's go through my analysis
1.What about if my gf doesn't take anything garri including eba nko?

2.I take my gf to a restaurant,not malam Musa shop,how will she pick gala and satchet water,I expect her to order for more rice but less meat

3.She may be wise that the man driving in that bugati maybe a driver and definitely know that am the real owner of my keke

4.If she pays for my t.fare,that isn't yet a good sign of a house wife,do u know how many times have been paying for both of us

5.My gf washing my bro and sis clothes is a great strategy to make my bro and sis my enemy if she does wrong and I quit.What is the extent of being good to my family and being a problem to me.

6.I agree a little with that but I don't like my gf wearing okrika

7.Do u know whether the airtime she is sending to u is being collected from guys wey dey service her wella.She sees u as husband materia,that is y she is doing everything to keep u

8.Same as number 7
.
.
Whats your own say?


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-21 19:45:18

881 Views



#Big Dreamer [Read it]


I'm tired of this nonsense!
So because I gave Obama my
phone number, I can no longer
rest again? He's always calling
me on my phone asking me for
advice. Imagine, he called me two
weeks ago to tell me that his
daughter is getting married!
If your daughter is getting
married so what? Then just last
week, Jay-z sent me a message
on Whatsapp asking for my
autograph to give to his wife,
Beyonce, I don't even knw how
he managed to get my number!
As if that wasn't enough, ever
since I gave Bill Gates money to
finance his business, Dangote
has been coming to my house to
disturb me, asking me to help
him too. Anyway, I gave him a
warehouse filled with money
yesterday, I hope he doesn't
come back to bother me again!
Even Bill Gates' daughter who I
broke up with has been
disturbing and calling me on
phone, sending me text
messages, asking me to accept
her back, I just don't know what
to do!
Now because I bought Ronaldo a
new Lamborghini, Messi started
disturbing me to buy for him
which I did two days ago.
And because i sponsored Davido's new video...Wizkid dosnt want to let me b..
Pls u'al should ask Rihanna ds question.."is it by force to date?
Most of all, you won't believe that
even World bank borrowed
money from me yesterday, I
don't even know when they'll
pay me back.
I'm tired! And all this while I still
sleep on the mat on the floor
dreaming...



NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-11-04 21:45:04

420 Views




Sparrow was infront with the Volvo…Uche was at the back with the Hilux..we were at the middle..i was keeping malice with him, I didn’t talk to him or even tell him thanks, after he helped me with my bags…but he didn’t seem to notice…
Jafar : are you hungry?
I ignored him.
Jafar: have you called Timi?…
I crossed my hands around my chest, I wasn’t going to answer him..
He laughed out..i looked at his fine features, his strong chin and well groomed goatee…
Me: just take me to Ijebu-Ode..
Jafar : yes boss…
He reached across his car’s cd player and pressed the play button.. It was Britney spears…”Everytime”…one of my best songs… why should this guy play this song now?…As he sang along, I joined him….in no time we were singing and smiling…that is how my malice ended o…chai…
Notice me
Take my hand
Why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?
Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it’s haunting me
I guess I need you baby
I make believe
That you are here
It’s the only way
I see clear
What have I done
You seem to move on easy
And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you’re haunting me
I guess I need you baby
I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song is my sorry
Ohhhh
At night I pray
That soon your face
Will fade away
And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you’re haunting me
I guess I need you baby
When we got to the sharp turn that ushered us into Ijebu-Ode…I stretched my left hand to meet his right hand…
Me: I will miss you…don’t die…you dare not die!
Jafar : I will miss you too…I will always be around…
Me: you know I like you, abi?
Jafar: I figured that out…
Me: you like me?
Jafar: No!..
I was elated until I saw him grinning…
Jafar: ofcourse I like you…
Me: how much?
Jafar: very much…
Me: ‘how’ is very much?
He blarred his horn and turned right into a filling-station, where he parked, the Volvo anf Hilux did same..…He relaxed my seat, so that it was almost flat…then he brought his lips closer…I met it half-way…i had been yearning for it since the last time we kissed…I wanted to taste him so that his flavor will remain in my mouth long after he was gone…I wrapped my arms round his neck and pulled him down…felt his chest grind my boobz…I bit his neck gently…ran my hand down his arm…his back…I was wet..i pulled him closer…then we stopped…we had to breath…we hadn’t been breathing…
He returned my seat to the normal position…and drove out of the filling station…. I was still breathing deeply…the kiss took my breathe away..
Jafar : was that enough?…
I looked at him…I wanted to run my hand round his face…I wanted to tell him that the past few minutes will last in my memory forever..
Me: kindha…
At night I pray
That soon your face
Will fade away
Timi was waiting in front of the eatery when we got there…My bags were transferred to the Starlet….After few pleasantries…Jafar and his guys drove off…
I was moody.
I was glad I was with Timi, I expect him to make me feel better in no time. Although I kept replaying everything that happened between Jafar and myself, I had to focus on the present. As Timi drove along, I tried figuring out the best time to tell him that I kissed Jafar..
Timi : are you okay? You look sad…
Me: I am good Timi, how far is the apartment?
Timi: It’s just the next street. Dapo, the guy who owns the place has travelled to Dubai, I have the keys…
Me: oh..thats good..
Timi: we are going to have so much fun…I know we are mourning but I will try to make you enjoy yourself..
Me: thank you, Timi.
Timi: don’t thank me, you know I love you…
I gave him a squeeze on the shoulder.
The apartment was a two-bedroom flat, sparsely decorated. As soon as we entered the room, Timi held me close..
TImi: you are the most important person to me…
Me: I am glad dear..
TImi: I know we are not where we should be now, but I have no doubt we will get there.
I remained in his arms for a while, I looked at his eyes and I saw love and admiration. I told myself I was at the right place..
Me: let me take my bath…
Timi: can I join you?…
Me: hahahahaha…rubbish boy…
I was in the bathroom, as the water splattered against my skin, I found myself thinking about Jafar again, the way he kissed me…held me…
I realized I was touching myself so I stopped. When I got back to the bedroom.. Timi had two wraps of beef-burger, a plastic bottle of coke and a plastic bottle of Sprite. I wore an over-sized jersey that Timi had given me, I was naked beneath…
Timi : Coke or Sprite?
Me: Sprite…
I initially enjoyed the Burger, but I soon got tired of it. Timi was done with his and proceeded to take a shower. I wanted to text Jafar, but I decided against it. I had to make a confession to Timi, that was my priority..i skimmed the Tv for programs to watch, Galaxy TV was the only clear station…I abandoned the Tv.
Timi entered the room with only a Towel around his waist.
Me: Fine boy…
He came to me, pushed me so that my back was pressed to the bed. The Jersey I was wearing slid up my thighs..He was on me, I had to spread my legs to accommodate his body. He rested on his elbows…
Our faces were inches apart…he wanted to kiss me, but I had to tell him what happened between Jafar and myself before I let him..
Me: Timi I have to tell you something…
He raised his head up, his waist was still on mine, I could still feel the rod-like hardness on me..
Timi: is it about Jafar?
Me: yes..
Timi: oh my God, don’t tell me you have slept with him…
Me: No….but I kissed him…twice…
Timi: thank God you didn’t ….
Me: you don’t mind that I kissed him?
Timi: I do but…I know you like him..i just hope I can win all your affection back that you don’t go back to him…I don’t deserve you…I know that…but I want to fight for you..
Me : awwwww…so sweet…
He came down and kissed me…his hands pressed against my b----t until he found my n-----s…
TImi: I miss this…
His other hand went beneath the Jersey…he started stroking me…
Me: Timi , I have something else to tell you…
Timi: cant we talk later?
Me: now…
TImi: what is it, my love?
Me: I am sorry but I have to break up with you…
Timi: what?
Me: I love you…I will always do…you know this…but I am not inlove with you anymore…
Timi: Jafar right?
I nodded…
He stood up with his arms held akimbo.
Timi: we can work through this..i understand…let us just build what we had from the scratch..
Me: my mind is made up , Timileyin..
Timi: over a cultist?
Me: I am sorry…
Timi: you are not thinking straight..
Me: I am…for the first time in a while…
Timi: so whats next?
Me: I have to go back to him, I belong with him…
Timi: what if he doesn’t want you?
Me: that’s the difference I guess…I love him not because I want him to love me in return…its enough for me just to love him..
I didn’t expect Timi to drive me back to Ago, but I didn’t expect him to dress up and just leave the house like that…
I took my bag, wore my slippers and went to look for Taxi, to take me to Ago…to Jafar..
To be continued

>>

A Fact:
Fuck a woman and she Loves you…

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Love a woman and she Fucks you…Related

LAUGH SMALL [Read it]


JOKE OF THE DAY?????????


Two secondary xkul old friends met at the university in which they are seeking 4 admission,this is d conversation BTW d two Frnds...
Guy1:Hey,ma guy hw u dey na????????
Guy2:I dey fine ooo
Guy1:na dis university u dey
Guy2:yes ooo u nko
Guy1:dem don gv me admission since last year na.
Guy2:dat gud na which course dem gv u na?
Guy1:ma guy na POLITICAL MEDICINE ooo u nko
Guy2:na ISLAMIC ENGEENEARING????????????????...Admission seekers no go kill us ooo????????


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-05-06 18:47:03

428 Views



crazy pictures [Read it]


LOL









NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-02-06 20:33:00

278 Views




Teacher to pappu :- What is Number Seven, Even or Odd.??

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Pappu :- Even

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Teacher :- How can you make seven even??

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Pappu :- Remove the S

Hehehe thoko lyk intellignt pappu k liyeRelated

I was on bed late in the evening when four of them
entered the room again, Opa and flaky were with a gun,
Mary was holding a bottle of red wine while SK was
smoking cigarette…. Mary: Flaky, pass the stuff to him “she passed a bottle of drink to me” Opa: Oga..oya drink that thing wey dey your hand Flaky: And you must finish everything Me: What is this please…Mary please i don’t want to die Mary: Its not your time to die yet……What you are to
drink is just energy booster SK: Oga..drink this thing sharply abeg “Opa pointed gun at me, i look at their face one after
the other, i could read meaning to every one of their
facial expression, i picked up the bottle and emptied it.
Flaky and SK moved towards me with a rope, tie my
hand and leg to the bed, i was spread to the bed facing
the ceiling, i begged for my life but all my pleas fell on deaf ears, i couldn’t struggle with them as two of them
pointed gun at me in that process too…. They all left the room after tying me to the bed and
barely 10minutes they left, i realized my deek was
getting hardness that i couldn’t control, it was so hard
that i started sweating, my deek was pointing to the
ceiling in full attention..the door opened again and
there come Mary and flaky….. Flaky: wow….this is huge Mary: You think say na small thing before? Flaky: I never take my time to look at it that very
day..you know it was in the night now… Mary: Now you have seen it….that is what the idiot is
using to disturb every girl and what that fool is dying
for Flaky: I think i should go into action before this thing
go down.. Mary: don’t be in a haste babe..this thing wont go down
in the next three to four hours..its all our meat but you
guys need to do me the honour of going first Flaky: Anyhow you want it Mama…..So far it will go
round Me: Please Mary..please don’t do this to me..I beg you in
the name of God Mary pull off the bump short and pant she was wearing,
she pull off her black pant too, rub something like
cream on her pussssy then climb on the bed..easily she
slide her pussy inside my deeek and started ridding
me… Flaky brought out a camera and started recording, i
don’t even know if she was on drug or not because the
way she was going shows that it was not with ordinary
eye, Mary was going faster on me, i was seriously
feeling the pain and didn’t even take long before i
started crying and begging for my life but it was all on deaf ear. At a time, she will engage in different style like facing
me while fucccking, resting a bit on my chest while
going on a slow motion, my hand and leg are tied so i
couldn’t do anything even though i tried to struggle
initially but i had to relax myself and accepted when i
realized there was no way. Mary switched position with flaky after like 25minutes
and the first thing she did was to clean my deek and
gave it the suck of his life..she was eating my deek raw
as if she wanted to cut it along whenever she is
through…Opa walked in during the process and was just
laughing with the bottle of vodka in her hand Flaky: Mama..you know say me i no dey enjoy nacking
like this ooooo.. Mary: wetyn happen? Wetyn you want? Your wish will
be granted Flaky: Mama..i wan pull off totally and want this idiot to
feel me, i dey think say make i untie his hand for this
my own round Mama…. Mary: Do as you wish….he cant try any drama except he
want to die before weekend….Help them out Opa “They untie my hand, Flaky removed all what she put
on as she was totally unclad, she got the biggest bweast
out of all of them and i was wondering why the it was
still standing as i assumed they must have done
something so bad and expected a sagging bweast. I was wondering where she was going to start from
until she started kissing me, i was eager to engage in
the act myself maybe i will have the opportunity to
release if my mind was on the sex. I had to play along
and put my mind in the act, i guess she was surprised
that i responded too as i started fondling her breast as she rested her pusssy on my deek. Flaky and Opa spend
more than 50minutes working on me, i didn’t cum
neither did my deek come down….i was seriously
sweating, crying like xmas goat and a bit weak.




NAIRAJOKES.COM




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On a crowded bus, Banta noticed that Santa had his eyes closed. “What’s the matter? Are you sick?” he asked.
“No, I’m okay. It’s just that I hate to see old ladies standing”, replied Santa.Related

All her words were so painful and entering my body, was it really her fault? Definitely NO. I was actually the one that fell in love blindly, i was so naive and amateur, Aisha definitely played a fast one on me but am i that dunce that she had to leave me for another guy without being remorseful? There was silence in the room as Aminat was walking up and down inside the room she came to me again after a while and started talking in a soft tone
“Abdulrahman, sincerely you need to let go, forget about Aisha, she is gone for good, she doesn’t think about you again, she has moved on so you need to move on and think about your own, there are million girls out there that are much better than Aisha, you still have a long way to go dear.
Look at you, you are a fine boy now, very handsome for that matter, forget the Alfa stuff that you are doing, deep down inside you there is a beauty which any lady will always die for. You will still meet so many ladies, far much better than Aisha, there are still a lot of us in the school, there is still NYSC, you will start working, and you will still meet female colleagues. Your neighbourhood too, there will be so many ladies flocking all over you, please you need to take this out of your mind and move ahead, i beg you in the name of Almighty Allah and Prophet Muhammed.
Me: Thank you so much Amina, have heard you…Almighty Allah will be with you too
Amina: Amen but is that a promise
Me: I will try
Amina: Not only try, you have to promise me………..
Me: Okay, i promise to try and do away with her thought
Amina: That is better….what did you eat this afternoon
Me: have not eaten but i will eat very soon, i only took cornflakes this morning
Amina: Cornflakes since morning and this is almost 6pm
Me: i will eat now…..
Amina: okay, don’t worry, what we will do is am not sure you will eat after i leave this place. Why not let us go out to a fast food and eat, while away time. At least change of atmosphere will definitely help a alot
Me: there is no need for that Amina
Amina: No oooo..its my call and i insist, i know you wont want to reject my offer for the first time…please
Me: okay…No problem
Amina: Thank you so much but before we go
Me: what is it again?
Amina: we will first go to saloon, you will shave and from there we will hang out and come back home…..
Me: Shave again?
Amina: yes of course, seems you have not been looking at the mirror all this while to see what you actually look like
Me: okay, as your lordship pleases..
Amina: let me go and change in my room, you can also change too…am giving you just 5 minutes Abdulrahman
Me: okay…
She left my room and i was still thinking about all what she said, she came back like 5 minutes later putting on a jean trouser and a V-neck top with a small purse in her hand. I was still the way i was when she left, blue shirt and a jean trouser which was just like four inches above my knee.
Amina: so, you are still here? You have not change?
Me: okay, don’t worry, no need for you to change, we can go like this……
I wanted to take my cap and she said no need for that, she dragged my hand and led me out of the room, Amina was having more courage by touching me but i didn’t resist in the first place while we are in the room. We walked down to Zanrab bus stop, took a ca going to tipper garage and we drop by the round about, there was a shopping plaza by the round about, we enetered the barbing saloon there, luckily for us, there was a vacant space.
I sat down and heard Aminat discussing with the guy that wanted to barb my hair, he brought out clipper and tie cloth round my neck then he said “low cut with shaving”, i responded by nodding my head in affirmative.
That was how he started cutting my hair, my mind started flashing back to me and Aisha, the scene of what happened when she introduced me to Ibrahim in her house, the way she has been avoiding me in school and all sort, i was totally lost in thought
Barber: Se o ti wa okay bayi? (Is it okay like this)
“i looked at the mirror and realized my hair was already on the lowest ever since i started barbing my hair and for my beards, they are nowhere to be found again, he had trim them down to the lowest.”
Me: why? What happened, why did you cut my hair so low like this?
Barber: It was aunty that said i should barb it like this (Pointed to Aminat), I even asked while i was barbing it and you were nodding your head in affirmative
Amina: I asked him to barb it this way…you look finer….its okay don’t worry dear, how much is our money
Barber: N100…..
“Aminat paid the barber as we left the place”
Me: so, where are we going…..
Aminat: Wait now…we will take bike from here to the place
She stopped a bike beside us, “Agba-dam”, ibo ni Agba-dam” (Where in Agba dam) the bikeman enquired…”close to lawal house”..Initially i wanted us to take separate bike but she insisted we take one because i don’t know where we are going to. She sat in the middle while i was behind heron the bike.

>>

AFRAID TO LOVE
written by Ahworegba Ewoma Patience

Episodes:


The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning.

The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered through the rear of the church.

One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, “Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!”

Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the assistant pastor. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The preacher was holding steady in the pulpit.

The men put their weapons away and said, gently, to the preacher, “All right, pastor, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the service.”




NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-01-26 08:37:53

402 Views




Akpos caught his pastor stealing offering money.
This was the conversation between them
Pastor: Blessed are those who see and don't talk.
Akpos: For they shall receive their share. Amen.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-05-08 15:34:37

800 Views



Akpos and Mfon [Read it]


Akpos just got married to an uneducated mfon,and when he undressed him self at night.
Mfon:what is that?
Akpos:you wont understand am the only one in the world that have it.
Two days latter when akpos returned back from work
Mfon:i thought you said your the only one that have that thing,but i saw it with musa when he was bathing.
Akpos:yes i had two so i decided to give musa one
Three days latter akpos came back from work
Mfon:you said you gave musa one of your thing
Akpos:yes thats correct
Mfon:then why his is own better and sweeter than yours
Akpos fainted


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2016-03-12 12:46:29

1291 Views




Mystification is simple; clarity is the hardest thing of all.

-Julian BarnesRelated

Girlfriend: Honey, I cannot open this

jar..



Geek Boyfriend: Try re-installing

java.. ????Related

Do you knw me [Read it]


A man goes into the supermarket and notices a very attractive woman waving at him. She says “Hello.”  


He is rather taken aback because he can’t place where he knows her from. So he asks, &ldquoo you know me?”  


To which she replies, “You are the father of one of my children.”


Now his mind travels back to the only time he was ever unfaithful to his wife. So he asks, “Are you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table while your partner whipped my behind with wet celery?”  


She looks into his eyes and says calmly, “No, I am your son’s teacher.


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-04-03 22:04:42

279 Views




On A Virgin's Funeral The Pastor Concluded By Saying "May That Be Eaten By Ants What She Refused To Be Eaten By Men


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-11-14 14:58:46

870 Views



two old men [Read it]


Two old men in a retirement village were sitting in the reading room and one said to the other, ''How do you really feel? I mean, you're 75 years old, how do you honestly feel?''''Honestly, I feel like a new born baby. I've got no hair, no teeth, and I just peed myself.''


NAIRAJOKES.COM







2015-04-15 08:29:36

360 Views



Safe cracker [Read it]


The local bank near a large prison had a problem opening their safe one day. Seems that the mechanisms working the combination failed, so they called the prison to seek help.
The prison had a convicted safe cracker in custody. They released him under guard and took him to the bank to see if he could open their safe.
The convict worked on the lock for quite a while but finally he was able to open the safe.
The bank president was delighted to see his safe opened without having to have it ruined in the process, he turned to the safe cracker and said, “Thanks for helping us out here, how much do we owe you?”
The safe cracker replied, “Well the last time I did one of these jobs I got about $100,000!”Related

When the kids arrived from school at three, everything at the house was back to it’s usual. There was no evidence of my afternoon tryst anywhere. . . .

That night, my eyes met Festus’ eyes, I expected the usual flirting but I saw nothing. We completed the evening as usual and I tried again to flirt with my husband but there was no response. I worried! He couldn’t possibly know!

Still, he wasn’t acting normally! I continued to worry as I perceived Festus to be distant from me; yet, he couldn’t possibly know of my encounter. Perhaps with time, I thought!

Next night, the gap between Festus and I remained. Much as I tried, I simply couldn’t seem to reach Festus and we went to bed separated by an invisible gulf.

I lay restless. . . Somehow, he knew, I thought!

Next evening, Festus brought me gifts and was especially attentive but I was still aware of a gap between us. . . all was not right. I regretted my tryst more by the minute. . . .How could Festus know?

Weeks passed as our marriage sputtered along, Festus and I began to lead separate lives. Even as Festus continued to bring me gifts and be especially attentive, we grew apart. Festus, instead of coming home as usual, started “hanging out with the boys” after work each day. . .
I worried as I sought ways to patch up the gulf between Festus and I; our marriage was surely headed for failure. It was my fault. I should have been more careful. I should never have engaged in that tryst. I beat myself everyday for that mistake I made!

One afternoon, when the kids came from school, they found me, Cordelia Obiora, sitting in the living room chair, non-responsive, and called a neighbour who, seeing the situation, put me in her car and took me to Gwagwalada Specialist Hospital in Abuja, where she works as a medical doctor.

Next morning, when I awoke, I lay in a hospital bed, heavily sedated and barely able to recognize Festus and the kids. I lay idle, apparently unable to move, and my mind could not concentrate. When Festus kissed me, I was unable to respond.

For the next several days, I lay alone in my bed, without visitors except for the clinical psychologist who came several times a day and profiled me with endless questions to which I answered truthfully and without reservations.

Soon, the clinical psychologist. knew my complete story and he began to give me necessary psychological therapy. After just a week of treatment, the clinical psychologist had convinced me I wasn’t a cheap and common slut but a beautiful, intelligent and moral wife, mother and homemaker who made a mistake. I was sitting up in a chair and feeling well when I received my first visitor – Festus!

Soon, I saw my kids and we were a family. It was then that the visitors were advised to go as I needed my rest! My family’s visit had been good. I was comfortable with our meeting.

Another week passed and I was up, walking, enjoying the surrounding gardens and outdoors of the hospital as I felt better than I had in a long time. I met daily with the clinical psychologist now! My kids no longer came to see me. My husband had two conferences to Attend in Awka and Yenagoa and was unable to also come as regularly as he does!

So it was that we sat on one of the Airport seats in the hospital and the clinical psychologist started his usual range of questions and the talk began.

After a few moments, the mind doctor said, ‘You’re ready to go home but your problem isn’t resolved. Don’t you think that you should relieve your guilt by telling your husband all about that tryst and starting to rebuild your life from there?’

‘But, if I tell him, he’ll divorce me and I’ve lost him and my family forever.’ I answered.

‘Appears that you’ve already lost them to me.’ He replied.

I thought. ‘Sounds like you’re right. So, how do I go about telling him?’ I asked.

>> Episode 5 -
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